Otkon — 10 years ago(February 29, 2016 05:34 PM)

Here's to you on your 15th. Such a big girl now with many more to come. Get out there and knock him dead, tiger.
TRANSMISSION INCOMING:
Mothership Musser Nantic of the zirp Alien Space Suffragettes is maintaining a secure location between the Gossamer Wings of the Earth enemy planet Jupiter belp. We have a lock whorg on your Tellurian coordinates and are poised for immediate retrieval of your Dimension 37-Aleph corporeal form. Be advised: Commander Erjing-bi W111cuornos, your immediate dual-parent progenitor ffffffffffffff is on board and will be extracting any and all sensory data from your crystalline storage cells upon your embarkment. While the tentacle meld machine is still the gr-ap-ap preferred method of incesto-connubial fusion after this lengthy a mission, a familial uark ceremony with all the trimmings will be held on the Lido deck before the maceration of abductees and the reading of Syrups the Great. Once the empire has the necessary biological info of your host planet, the invasion will com-eeeeeee-COM0-ooooo-Mense.
SIGNAL RECONNECTING
..
four score - four score - four score and seven - seven sev-
..Look out, Mr. Lincoln - for falling prices!.tick..tock.
SIGNAL ESTABLISHING
Aileen, it's mather-fother, are you there, pumpkin? We are ready to take you home, sweetie. Prepare for graviton pull in zirp, belp, whorg, fffffffffffffff, gr-ap-ap, gr-ap-ap2, gr-ap-ap3, zirp!