• The best way to handle criminals in on rooftops;
• In the building where he lives, Cash is the only person that has a parking spot;
• Instead of screaming and cover themselves, club dancers will only giggle at you if you enter their room;
• trucks don't go over Ray Tango;
• Cash couldn't had sleep because of the big black guy;
  "You're a funny man, Sully, I like you. That's why I'm going to kill you last."

In prison, Cash will get brown sugar in his ass.
Dont trust the judge.
Tango and Cash's whole trial beep sucked.
Hitmen will jump out from behind the mirror in your apartment.
The floor of a toilet is the best place for english 101.
Tangos grenades are bloody duds.
Cash likes plan C.

141: It's all the way in.
In all my life, I will never love a woman the way this officer loved that lip ferret.

140 If you don't know who set you up.You don't know SH*T

138 Punching an overly large Black guy in the ribs on the bunk above you, can cure him of constipation
139 Gabriel really does owe Ray-one-
Hell is other People

138. If you live in the eighties and you're young and attractive, don't ever have sex or you risk being interrupted by an action sequence.
139. If you're a henchman and a co-worker has your enemies distracted, rather than just shooting them run up to one of them with a flying kick through the air.
140. There is never an inappropriate moment for a wise crack or two.
     Proud member of AA

oh and I forgo one more thing.
137. If your going to prison, don't forget to bring the marshmellows!

131. A slinky can look 20 feet long when wraped around a prison inmate.
132. You could always use a little more IRON in your diet.
133. Its easy to escape a maximum security prison when both the guards and inmates are looking for you.
134. Tango gets lonley very quick.
135. usually when you steel a very fat dudes jumpsuit, they will fit you pretty nicely.
136. The bad news is we're almost outa gas. The good news is we're ALMOST OUTA GAS.

The crapper belongs to your new cellmate.
Prisons dont have golf courses.
Tango has seniority, so he makes the statements.
Tango and Cash are like two little mice.
DONT INSIST!
If you dont like your new cellmate, wrap a slinky around his head.
Cash never talked about plan C.
Never bump uglies with Tango's sister.
Conan deserved to have his jaw broken and rammed into a prison bar.

Rambo is a pussy.

crazy people arnt afraid of anybody
cops can be easily distracted by pizza
rubber baby buggy bumpers HA U DIDNT THINK I WAS GUNNA SAY THAT DID YOU

This message has been deleted.

Yves Perret thinks it is easier or quicker to bake a cake or clean a toilet bowl
it is always a good idea to have electric cables in the rain.
Cash has a few admirers
August the 14th was the day cash was hatched.
Tango will visit Jabba the Hut

It's always a good idea to test the massive laser sight you have attached to your loaded gun by aiming said gun at your hand in order to shine the light on it.

I can't believe no one has pulled this one out
101. Apparently, heavily armed SUV have the mechanical ability to automatically aim, fire, and reload without any human input.

All asians know how to speak English if you'll only beat it out of them.
Sly Stallone magically transforms into a 'roided Harold Ramis by wearing glasses.
You're only out of your jurisdiction if the local cops show up.
During lockdown, prisoners can easily abduct other prisoners from their cells without any prison guards ever noticing.
Clunky overweighted mini-RV's can go 0-60mph in 5.5 seconds. They also do not swerve or decelerate when the driver has abandoned the wheel.
Jack Palance will never make martyrs out of cops.
Accelerating for 5 seconds in front of a transport truck automatically puts you half a mile in front of said truck, allowing you to stop in the middle of the road, exit your car, unnecessarily reload your underpowered .38, and fire several shots at the incoming transport as an homage to Jackie Chan.

Will Chance

• Yanks will never EVER represent an English accent correctly, because apparently the English sound like cliched Australians.
  If that was in reference to the Brion James character, then you are well off the mark. Sounded very English.

42. If you want Cash's vote for the Psycho Hall of Fame, You got it!

oh, snap!!! I'm rollin' on that one.because I read it using Kurt Russell's voice.
Take your pinche color-coordinated sponsored chingada and take a flying fck

54. Dalton was right, ALWAYS CHECK THE RIGHT BOOT!!!
    ==========
    Well played, well played

This is too funny, looks like most of mine were stolen.
54. Dalton was right, ALWAYS CHECK THE RIGHT BOOT!!!
55. If a hot stripped gives you a massagae, she will get off too.
56. You can keep a loaded gun in an unlocked draw and the worest will happon is that someone will beep with you sights.
57. You can make a beep load of money and dress in Italian suits, but in Beveraly Hills your still a wop.
58. The LA DA office will always belive a convicted felon over a highly decorated Cop.
59. You can easily frame two cops in a room full of FBI with the ol dissapearing hankie trick.
60. The government is in the habbit of selling off milatary land to drug lords.
61. You can have a huge gunfight with a RV from Hell, multipal truks, and earth moving equipment and no one will notice.
62. It's always a good idea to destroy eveidence of illegal gun trading when trying to prove that the guy setting you up is doeing something illagal.
63. When trying to prove that your not a psycho murding cop on the take, it's always a good idead to shoot the one guy that prove your innocence in the head.

101. Prison guards will work with an inmate to kill the guy who planned the escape for the main stars when the plan was hatched without anyone else watching/hearing but will be unable to stop the 2 said stars from escaping.
102. Ray Tango misses his wardrobe (cant believe that one hasnt been said)
103. Hot teens are having sex in their car in underground parkings
104. Cash would like to be as forgiving as Tango but frankly this whole thing ******* sucks
105. Cops doing a search in a tities bar will easily be distracted by the strippers (i would be 2, Teri Hatcher in shiny underwears = epic)
106. Cash with his IQ is unarmed and still VERY dangerous.
107. Cash put half the criminals in prison.
108. Captain Dynaball was a character from Conan the Barbarian (love those Stallone-Schwarzenegger jokes, like the President Schwarzenegger in Demolition Man)
109. The crapper of a big black inmate is his.
110. Slinky is not afraid of Tango because he killed his best friend.

Tango "screens" his guests with a fly-screen.

SUVs really do have terrible gas milage.
Also if someone hands you a smaller gun than theres, it's cause of genetics.