"The use of force will only add millions to the law suit." Bam! "Uuuuuuuugh!"."Now YOU can sue me."

Lot's of great lines in this movie. My two favorites (already cited) are:
"You're a piece of s*** and I'm ashamed of you."
"Let's face it I don't believe in your authority."
My 150 (or so) favorite movies:
http://www.imdb.com/list/ls070122364/

"Tell your boss, I'm coming to get him! You know what, on second thought I'll tell him!"

"You got nothing to be afraid of, that's just Mr. federal agent-man. What you gonna arrest me for 10 minutes. too?"
"You been hanging out with the ignorant people. You see we educated"
"Use of force will only add million's to the lawsuit."

One of my favorites:
Jack Taggert: Is this kind of like deliverance or something?
Prostitute: What the beep are you doing?
Johnny: I'm gonna kill a bunch of people.

I can't believe this quote is neither here nor in the quotes-section, but when he's got the fake fed standing in a pool, drenched in gasoline, holding a flare, he says something like: "Tell your boss, I'm coming to get him no wait, I'm gonna tell him myself!" [shoots the flare in half, watching the guy screaming, and then again just before it hits the ground, putting out the flame]

• that bit had me laughing out loud!

You broke my wood and thats no good
"You are tearing me apart, Lisa!"" The Room..a cinematic masterpiece.

Hanner Sr : "I've got a lot of money, I'll give you some of it to go away"
And - "My son is a great disappointment to me.."
Seagal outside the hardware store. Correcting everyones grammer - " you mean someone "might" get hurt?"

Hanner Jr: "Dad, how am I supposed to take over some day if you dont let me run my operations?" Hanner Sr: "You wont have to. I`m gonna live forever."

Tons of great ones, but I was just watching FDB and one that got me laughing was during the fight scene by his pick up truch after Jack buys his lumber. They tell him to get out and then like 5 guys try to jump him. He obviously woops ass with a wooden rod, but then one of the guys he beats up says in the background faintly "I've never been hit so hard in my life." I was laughing out loud for a good 5 minutes after that.
Classic Seagal film.

I have a bunch but these were my favorites:
Thug: "You could be an English teacher except probably you don't understand plain English. Get out."
Thug 2: "Get out. That's pretty plain English. Get out."
Seagal: "I've also decided that if you don't like it, that's tough sh**
Thug: "I've got your tough sh** right here."
He tries to punch Seagal then Seagal elbows him and takes out 5 or 6 guys with a piece of wood.
Then Seagal says: "I cracked my wood. That's no good."
Thug (with his nose broken): "Turn him loose. I said turn him loose."
Then Seagal backfists him in the nose - that was great.

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has to be when seagal knocks the hillbillys teeth out in the bar and the hillbilly says "is that all you got son, you gotta have more than that"
pure magic

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"how's the proctologist?"
"let's face it i don't believe in ur authority"
"Junior!come here i wanna talk 2 u"
"do u call the fire department when somebody lights a cigarette?"
"you couldn't take a cheeseburger out from the drive through"
"now u can sue me"

"I loved fixing your porch."

Kristofferson: "Son you couldn't take out a cheeseburger from a drive-thru."
Almost spit my beer across the room on that one!

"did you get to first base or did you take him all the way home?"

Watched this again last night, and there were so many classics:
Bald guy: "You came this close to having me stomp your ass."
Bald guy: "I'm gonna have to educate you on how to properly beat the s*** out of someone."
Kristofferson: "Son you couldn't take out a cheeseburger from a drive-thru."
Seagal: "When this is over, you can go to your favourite proctologist and get a soothing ointment. How do you want it?"

Youre a piece of beep and Im ashamed of you.

'Now maybe that's because i'm a bad shotor maybe I just wanted you to live to meet Tyrone'.

Best quote is when they're at the square dance and Sarah turns to Seagal and says, "Do you play guitar?" to give him a lead-in to play guitar with the band. I could just see Seagal wanting that added in when going over the script lol

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