I appreciate your sorrow.
E pluribus unum

If you thought this was funny I feel sorry for you

Daniel Stern kind of stole this movie from Slater. Berkow is kind of the "conscience" of the group, which isn't saying much.
His Adam Berkow saying to Slater,
"Have you done this
before
?!?"
had me rolling on the floor.
E pluribus unum

"Give me a break, they don't have Jews in Asia." is pretty damn funny when you realize Israel is in Asia (though yes they were obviously talking about Eastern Asia).

Ahhh yes, Slater, I love that guy.

Delivered as only Christian Slater can:
"What does THAT mean?! Are you insane? Do you actually think I would hurt Lois? She's the mother of these kids for Christ's sake! What's wrong with you? You've got a real nasty side to your thought process!"

Ha Ha lmao. Also "toestoes.I'm holding toes!"

"Under Jewish law, the body cannot rest if not united. We've got their parts all mixed together. We can't do this to them!"
"Give me a break, they don't have Jews in Asia."
"That is absolutely not true!"
"I've got his upper leg and her lower leg. I've got his upper leg and her lower leg!"

Nobody has mentioned this one yet.
Christian Slater asks are u sure this was an accident right when he sees the dead hooker.
Haha that's funny because it implies Jeremy piven would rather kill the hookera then pay her 500 dollars lol

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"Your kid is one crutch short of a telethon, you've got a frigid, swamp-hog wife

I love this movie and almost any line is an absolute killer.
"You left a dead prostitute alone in the desert?!"
(crying) "She's not alone"

"I'd like to speak to someone in chairs, please."

"You beep
"All right, he'll bleed out. He'll bleed out."

"I'm thinking about maybe making a move."
"A move?"
"Yeah. Greenpeace. Maybe go up to the north pole, the arctic. Tag polar bears with dart guns. I've always had pretty good aim."

"I'm a beep lighthouse, man! I stay lit for you! I stay lit! I never go dark! Never go dark!"

Sorry to post twice, but I had to also mention the classic line from Daniel Stern while getting in Jon Favreau's face: "You don't ever eyeball your children!"

When Jeremy Piven is having sex with the prostitute in the bathroom, I always get a laugh out of when he says to her "You thought I was gonna be a punk, didn't ya?" LOL

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I burst out laughing at the line '' He had a thing for hookers'', just the way Slater says it. I was like ''ohhhh nooo that's not cool HAHA''
-We split the car.
-How the beep do you split a car, you dummy? With a beep chainsaw?

When charles is digging up the corpses near the end and is going on about the lack of racial intergration. "I want a little black brother".also when he screams JESUS CHRIST!!!! when he getting the rings at the wedding

That scene right there made me really enjoy watching him over and over again and pay close attention to his acting in all his movies.
He is very good.
I felt bad when he died, but his death made everything that more Kaotic.
Stern is the bomb.

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Everything Daniel Stern and Christian Slater say in this movie is downright hilarious, and even Jeremy Piven to some degree.
I think probably the funniest line though would either be Stern's whole "WHY WAS THE FLOOR WET?" part in the accusatory tone, like somehow Piven would intentionally have made the floor wet so he'd slip and get a spike stuck in the hooker's head along with Diaz's post-wedding explanation of plan for Favreau to kill his last remaining friend and the dog and bury them in the desert, lol. That part was just perfect because here he JUST married her and even though there were warning signs of this before, he finds out at that moment that he basically married a female Boyd, lol.

you're right about almost every "f" line being hilarious.
-she fought like a fin Comanche.
-Mr. Fin Minivan

WHIZZERS! WHIZZERS!
Stern was super mega stressed out and did not want to go get them.
Tripplehorn magnified it more with her tone.

I forget how exactly it went, but:
"I've got a combosituationI've got some of him, and some of her"

GOOSED BY GOD!!!!!!