Peasant, please! Stop your whining.
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Are you being flippant PM?
Why, I'll bet if this disaster happened in your precious London you'd be there stripped to the waist with beads of sweat forming on your brow, your lily white chest blinding all those around you wobbling like a jelly, whilst you personally held the walls of the dam together…
Where was I? Oh yes, but because it's happening up North you don't care do you?
We're just scum to you, we are just "those people". Well let me tell you PM, those people may have northern accents and keep whippets in their britches, they may eat the occasional Gregg's pasty and down a pint of Newcastle Brown but God damn it they are almost human.

One does not got to a party at Michael's, sir, for Michael is always partying at the invitation of somebody else.
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Oh good Lord, Boris. Have you been at one of Michael's parties again?
Lord President of the Council, Leader of the House, Chairman of the ERG, MP for North East Somerset and I sit next to Boris at Parliament

The right honorable lady seems to think that her Prime Minister and the Leader of the House of Commons are engineers, or project managers.
We are both highly intelligent and extremely talented, of course, superior in many, many regards, but I did not promote Mr. Rees Mogg so that he could abandon parliament to build a dam, and I do not think the wonderful Conservative membership selected me to lead the country so that I could skulk off to make mortar and lay brick.
Besides, these people have had plenty of time to escape, so I see no reason to be overly concerned now.
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Boris would probably send in the Dam Busters to solve the problem.

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Might I take this opportunity to welcome the honorable gentleman to this bastion of discourse, and exclaim how wonderful it is that he has finally graced us with his presence.
It's been an excruciating wait, sir, but damn well worth it. I look forward to watching you put Red Jeremy to the sword.
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Your brother is?

Are you taking the pisses mr.reesmoog?
I ain't no homo.
Well, this is a tomb. I'll make them feel at home