Only in being too kind to my enemies and those who are not worthy. I shall never be guilty of such a crime again. No more forgiveness. No more mister nice guy. only relentlessly hungry from this day forward.
The Lion does not give a fuck. Bring. More. Sheep.

does one case of multiple sexual battery count?

i used to steal cars
My password is password

Relevant authorities have been notified. Enjoy the upcoming raid, bitch.

You sexy lil criminal
Don't tell Harry

*Oregano
My password is password

He says it's interesting that you're posting on Oregan time again.
My password is password

i beg your pardon?

That tax payer funded creative basket weaving degree really paid off huh?

and catfishing
My password is password

shoplifting as a teen
purchasing, delivering and trafficking illegal drugs now

I’ve stuck anti-apartheid and anti-monarchy stickers on council property, is that a crime.
My password is password

This message has been deleted.

I read that as leftover mice.
Don't tell Harry

I'm sure by some small, obscure legal technicality that's never enforced, yeah. We probably all do on a regular basis, given how convoluted laws can be
Beyond that, I was thinking about this recently, and no. Smoking weed where doing so is illegal, trespassing in old abandoned buildings to explore… lots of citations I could've theoretically gotten, but that's about it. Nothing prison worthy. I've never even stolen anything. I tried to steal a candy bar when I was 13, just to do it, and felt super guilty so just walked around the aisle and put it back. I'm horrible
I'm so boring. I'm presently eating some leftover mince of my last secret friend, and even he agreed I seemed very boring. It endeared me to him. We sat and played chess for a couple weeks. I considered letting him go… alas

Oh yeah, all of that, minus selling a mattress without the tag on it (that's some weird ****… how'd THAT happen? Must be a story)

Speeding, jaywalking, some light treason, selling a mattress without the tag on it, impersonating a bishop.

Murder
My password is password

yes i have

Yes myself and a pal "stole" a Christmas tree from one classroom and put it in our classroom. I did time for that.
You stupid fuckers, you know who you are.

And you know what, out of all the things he has done in the past, not once did I ever call the polce on him (cuz who needs those twats involved anyway) and I do ONE THING and he called them. Fucking vile **** can die a long and painful death for all I care.

I still keep my eye out for that twat whenever I visit town!

Didn't you extinguish a cigarette on a heritage building which resulted in it going up in flames.?
My password is password

And it has since been wiped from my record cuz it was like idk like 20 years ago and I haven't been in trouble since