Sparkly Angel, of all the facts that are listed in this thread is that the only one you have a problem with?
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Forgotten_Lore — 16 years ago(March 16, 2010 04:39 PM)
A devout fan of The Highlander saga, Tobin Bell has often been known to walk of the sets of films because the directors want to airbrush out the large tatoo that he has on his left shoulder. Speaking frankly in interviews Tobin has said that it was a case of talentless hacks trying to limit his expression, and that their narrow-mindedness shows in the quality of films which they produce. Martin Scorsese and Savid Lynch are yet to comment.
Never one to question the teachings of his father, Tobin spent the first 33 years of his life believing that he was a woman, and even married his first wife under the pretense of being a lesbian. He has since found out that this was not the case, and was merely another of his dad's psychological torments. Now when asked about it in interviews he usually responds with a wry chuckle and says 'but seriously'
Tobin has caused controversy on the set of Saw VII by demanding that all cast memmbers weigh at least 150 pounds more than himself. This is due to his belief he looked fat in Saw VI resulting in his subsequent suffering from a condition in which he forces regurgetation in order to maintain a low body weight. This condition which Bell has called "Bellend Belly Chunks" is more frequently referred to as Bulimia. Tobin has to combat his weight removed all lettuce and tomato from his BLT sandwiches on set. He has also been getting additional exercise by participating in sponsored unprotected sex sessions to raise money for AIDS research.
Bell has decalred 2010 "The year of The Bellend" and went on a country wide promotianal tour in China hoping to incorporate this into their calendar. So far the efforts have been futile, despite countless hours of Bell performing "The Tobin Dance" and "Bellend Thrust" to tens and sometimes even dozens of spectators. Tobin next plans to go on China's third most popular horse based chat show to further his campaign.
Tobin has never been in a shower or bath for longer than 15 seconds due to an intense fear of water. This is due to the fact his childhood pet Goldfish died in water and to a lesser extent his mother, who died in a seperate boating and/or harpooning incidents.
Ever the sly fox, Tobin likes to convince people on set that he has more hair than he really does by waring a turban. When asked if he wears it as a symbol of his faith Tobin tends to look at the other party blankly.
When filming his legendary role of Ornin in the episode The Eyes Have It of Charmed, Tobin became his alter-ego The Bellend, and tried to prank co-star Holly Marie Combs by bounding through a door that she was walking towards. The results were catastrophic, her miscarrying, but she dropped the legal proceedings after she was touched to see his sensitive tribute to it in Saw IV. They remain friends to this day, often sharing a laugh about the event, which in hindsight, was really pretty funny.
They have since stopped being best friends again after he raped her last year. Fortunately the Jury consisted entirely of devoted fans to the television series Once and Again, who recognized him for his role in the episode Aaron's Getting Better (where he did a signature understated performance as Man in Suit) and he was found not guilty. For these 12 men Tobin has since promised to do them a one time performance of Saw VI in which he plays all the roles. The jurors have unfortunately not contacted him on the offer so far.
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away" is a sentence Tobin takes very seriously often eating anywhere upto two dozen apples in a single day. This is due to his fear of the doctor, not because of a fear of his own mortality but rather a fear of his doctor molesting him as happened between th5b4e ages of 4 and 35.
Tobin does not fear his own mortality due to his unwavering belief that he is immortal. While Bell recognises his physical body will one day die he feels he will live forever through his life's work. He was quoted while shopping for horse food during the time of his unsuccesful stable as saying "I hope young film students of the 22nd century will see me and my films just as they see Gone With The Wind and Casablanca today". In a related note Tobin has recently signed on for Saw 11.
Tobin believes "actions speak louder than words". This has caused many problems on the set of Saw VII where Bell has ripped up his copy of the script. He instead has walked into every scene not knowing what he or other characters are going to say and responded to others in the scene through spontaneous off the cuff performances of interpretive dance.
Saw 10 tentatively titled "Saw X : For Whom The Bellend Tolls" is currently going to have the biggest twist of the series. Following a suggestion from Bell it will be revealed that Tobin's autopsy was faked and all part of a "practical joke" playing off his well known real-life Bellend persona. John Kramer will be revealed to have an identical twin brother named Lester (an in joke for Buried Alive fans) who Tobin killed so he -
ryanlennie2005 — 16 years ago(April 08, 2010 04:42 PM)
Tobin Bell recently stated he has decided to refuse all script offers that do not end with a twist. This has obviously greatly angered directors such as Scorsese, Cronenberg, Lynch and Aronofsky. However M. Night Shyamalan was delighted and has signed Bell up for his next eleven films including the highly unanticipated 'The Seventh Sense' in which a young boy develops the ability to smell dead people. Shyamalan has had to work Bell into the already completed script by making the boy a victim of a child molesting catholic priest.
Despite his hectic schedule in being the president of the united states, Barack Obama always finds time to see a new Saw film on it's day of release. In fact, during an interview with Time Magazine he revealed that his love for these films has even informed his politics, with his desire to instigate a reform in the american health care system being primarly influenced by Tobin Bell's powerul critique of it in the latest Saw film. As a tribute, the US health reform bill was originally going to be called the Tobin Bill, but the senate only agreed to pass it on the condition that the name were changed.
In 2005, Following the complaints of one of his wives that he need 'exercise more often' Tobin went on a pilgrimage to Vatican City where he trained for a full excorcism licence with the church and dedicated the next 7 months of his life to doing missionary work. Following his eventual realization of the minuderstanding Tobin agreed to do another 4 saw films so as to better support his families.
Tobin as has previously been mentioned is an avid hunter, killing many animals 'for beep and giggles'. The reason for this lifelong enthusiasm is because he believes he is from a long lineage of great hunters and predators. His father according to Tobin was often referred to as 'a bear' and his mother a 'man trap'. Tobin has dismissed suggestions that this might be due to his father being a large, hairy man who frequented the Massachussets gay scene and his mother a woman known to lie to dozens of men that she was on the pill as 'unrelated'.
Tobin recently left MySpace in objection after an argument wherein Tom wanted to block him. When quizzed on it Tom said that he just didn't consider Tobin to be enough of a personal friend to justify having him on his lift. Shortly after Dan Akroyd quit the site and went straight to the media, but unfortunately the event got minimal coverage as it was overshadowed by the tragic splitting up of once happy couple Lenny Henry and Dawn French.
Feeling sorry for Henry and French, Tobin has organized an annual minute of silence to be held in their honour every September the 11th, since it is a day when he also once felt particularly sad (due to an unfortunate traffic hold-up in New York Tobin missed his audition for Troy, and so the role went straight to Orlando Bloom). Being a busy man Tobin does not like to have too many days of mourning and has thus designated September 11th as his mourning day. Last year he arranged his mothers funeral for September 11th despite her death occuring in May. Tobin often opts to kill two birds with one stone (see previous facts for the origin of this phrase).
Always one to help those in need, in 2006 Tobin decided to aid in helping population control in the third world. Concerned that educating local populations on the dangers of unprotected sex is not practical enough, Tobin trained for a full abortion doctors licence and dedicated the next 6 months of his life to doing missionary work. Following the realization that his practices were illegal Tobin agreed to do another 3 Saw films so as to better support his families.
Tobin recently stated that he will no longer travel by plane. This he said was not due to the events of 9/11 but his viewing of the film Flightplan. Tobin says it affected him deeply as it was so bad he couldn't sit through it again and there's always the chance it might be the in flight movie. Leaving him 'no choice but to commit suicide through excessive penetration of my own anus'.
To try and overcome his fear of flying Tobin recently booked himself on to a psychological rehabilitation course on the subject. Fee111cling smug that he had got his place at a bargain price, Tobin was upset to soon learn that the course took place in Norway, and so he had to leave weeks early for it. The various roleplay exercises were sadly deemed ineffective on him, after councillors felt that Tobin was unable to perform to an adequate level in the various role-play based tasks.
Always one to lend an ear Tobin Bell has recently been doing volunteer work as a Rape Crisis hotline counselor. However after 2 days he has been released from his duties following many women being distressed to hear his gruff, creepy voice following their attack. Tobin defended himself by claiming he wanted the rape victims to be excited to be talking to someone of his level of fame 'to brighten up their day', and thus 'decided to give my rape counselor vo -
ThoseLittleRabbits — 15 years ago(August 05, 2010 10:10 PM)
tobin has tha best horror voice eva
i am amazing..you should know this
www.myspace.com/450983229 -
Forgotten_Lore — 15 years ago(March 25, 2011 07:54 AM)
Since the release of Saw 3D the lack of public appearances from Tobin has lead a lot of fans and MTV news to speculate that the actor is has died. This is however not the case, he has just been biding his time writing a new broadway show that dea16d0ls with his rise to the top. Tobin is very excited about this, telling me in an exclusive interview that he has always wanted to work with actor Dane Cook who will be playing him.
While many people would assume that Dane Cook is too young to play Tobin Bell it is worth mentioning that Dane Cook is in fact the older of the two actors, as Tobin Bell is in fact only 30.
Despite the recent silence surrounding the life of Bell, he was very worried about courting controversy last year after stepping on stage during the MTV music awards and spoiling Taylor Swift's speech. Thankfully though the US media played down his part in it and instead blamed it on a black guy.
In recent months Tobin finally got to travel the world as he has always wanted to, fulfilling a life long dream of visiting Japan. Unfortunately Tobin's plane touched down on March 11th. Still, always one to make the best of a bad situation Tobin set up a stall and aksed people to pay the yen equivalent of $25 for a photograph with him and used the money to buy an earlier flight home.
A man who is famously silent about his beliefs, Tobin astonished fans when he told them at this years Blood and Guts Fest that he doesn't beleive in things that he can't see; in particular, love and music.
Fans speculate that the character of Jigsaw was killed in Saw III because the writers originally intended for the films to make up a trilogy before a succesful box office performance prompted them to make another 4. This was not the case though. It was in fact because the producers were given strict orders to give Tobin less screen time since the actor was being increasingly less capable of reading the scripts after forgetting how to read in 2006 (a condition that he blames largely upon his lazyness).
As such Tobin has been largely improvising his dialogue since, and so the flashback sequences tend to be filmed first with the rest of the film being determined by what Tobin comes up with.
An avid campaigner for human rights, Tobin Bell is very grateful to affirmitive action guidelines which helped to get him the life changing role of Jigsaw in the first place after it was found that the actor suffers from erectile dysfunction. Tobin now uses handicapped toilets.
They say the average man thinks about sex every 3 seconds, but it is infact closer to 85 seconds - however, Tobin was one of the 7 participants employed in the study to determine the temporal qualities of sexual thoughts, and as such managed to serverely floor the data.
Never a fan of staying away from his family for long periods of time, Tobin has made a paper mache model of himself to lie in bed beside each of his wives and kids when he is on the road. The models also have an audio function rigged to them so that once per hour they play one of five Tobin catchphrases. -
ryanlennie2005 — 14 years ago(April 25, 2011 03:09 PM)
Tobin Bell is often seen sitting in a chair, laying in bed or on a floor in the Saw films due to his inability to walk in a straight line. This is because one of his legs is a full 6 inches shorter than the other. This is due to Tobin having 6 inches removed from his right leg in 1987 and joining it to his penis, taking him upto 7 inches in length. This would have meant he could satisfy his wives however Tobin unsuccesfully attempted to attach it himself with a combination of saliva, semen and wishful thinking.
Tobin Bell has never seen any of his wives naked, this is because due to a rare condition within his vascular system erections cause his retina's to detach. Thus Tobin has given up on trying to watch "Embarrassing Bodies".
The saying "money doesn't grow on trees" is based on Tobin Bell who in 1991 told the world's press he had successfully done just that. However upon inspection the gree5b4n foliage was actually leaves not the dollar bills Tobin had suggested. It is possible that in his excitement he achieved an erection and his retina's once again detached.
Contrary to popular belief Tobin is not the father of Jamie Bell the star of Billy Elliot. He is however the son of the legendary Eileen Bell. http://www.imdb.com/board/20068182/
Tobin can suck his own penis, as previously mentioned his penis is very small however he can detach his head from his spinal column at will. This ability developed after he allowed his neck to be severely split open at the end of Saw 3 during a stunt where he was attacked with a circular saw.
The saying "don't shoot the messenger" is based on Tobin Bell who throughout the 1990's went through approximately 87 postman having shot them whenever they attempted to post a bill through his letterbox.
Tobin is a believer in the cliche that "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach". In fact he attempted to perform a gasterectomy on Joe Pesci as he slept. This was when they were co-starring in Goodfella's in an attempt to get Pesci to fall in love with him. -
Forgotten_Lore — 14 years ago(May 16, 2011 08:58 AM)
Contrary to popular belief it was not Tobin Bell that suffered a t5b4ragic miscarriage earlier this month. It was in fact Kelly Brooke. After the constant hounding from the press on the issue Tobin just wishes to be left alone during this hard time
Tobin was originally invited to attend the royal wedding, having built a friendship with Prince William after a surprise meeting in 2006 when he was promoting the saw films in london. Initially Tobin accepted, but the changed his mind because he wanted to watch the event at home to see himself on TV. He immediately regretted this decision -
demonic_hater — 12 years ago(January 18, 2014 02:32 PM)
Here's another fact. In around the world in 80 days he shows up near the very end where the main villain goes on a rant telling everyone that no one can stop him then after he says "you?" For the 3rd time then you'll see Tobin in a top hat and a mustache displaying a surprised look in his face. Keep an eye out and try not to blink. By the way he's not credited.
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Noname — 2 years ago(February 16, 2024 12:17 PM)
I know you write it 15 years ago but I seen it just now, and I don't understand what you meant in fact 7, he is actually gay and actually had such experiences? Or he is actually not gay and didn't had such experience? What the truth???