Best Line

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somesunnyday — 10 years ago(February 04, 2016 01:12 AM)

The kid to Basil - "These eggs look like
you
laid them"
Colonel Hall introduces his rather short wife to Basil - "Don't get up"

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deem_bastille — 10 years ago(February 06, 2016 09:11 PM)

When I asked you to build me a wall, I was hoping that instead of just dumping the bricks in a pile, you might have found time to cement them together, you know, one on top of the other, in the traditional fashion.
I MEAN WHAT IS THE BLOODY POINT? I AM DOING IT, AREN'T I?
I'll put an ad in the papers: "Wanted, kind home for enormous savage rodent. Answers to the name of Sybil."
Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.
Edmund Blackadder.

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drunkbear — 10 years ago(February 24, 2016 11:53 AM)

"Hello Fawlty Towers how are you ees nice day. Oh, ees you again. I tell you, he no here!" [waves the phone around the room so it can 'see' the absence of Basil]
"Yes, yes, men are hereyes, men are working" [to builders] "You WORK, men!" [back to the phone] "Que? Que? Sisi [to builders] "Please, which one ees Man With Beard?" [to phone] "Si, si, I tell heem, si." [to bearded man] "You are crepious u-ran-gu-tan."
"Well it's not my fault! He was supposed to wake me!"
"WHO was supposed to to wake you?!"
[brief pause]"It is my fault."
"MANWELL!!! I KNEW IT!!!"
"You may have come on no bicycle, but that does not say that you know everything."

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jonathan-m-stone — 10 years ago(February 24, 2016 02:26 PM)

"Wish it was an ingrowing tongue!".
"If the good Lord"."is mentioned once more I shall move you closer to him".

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drunkbear — 10 years ago(February 25, 2016 12:04 PM)

You mean 'The good Lard,' don't you?
"You may have come on no bicycle, but that does not say that you know everything."

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jonathan-m-stone — 10 years ago(February 25, 2016 12:05 PM)

I do indeed.

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CaptiveBoltPistolero — 9 years ago(April 08, 2016 08:32 AM)

"You are orally men." - Manuel

"One batch, two batchPenny and dime."

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nicholasjameslynch — 9 years ago(May 24, 2016 04:31 AM)

I believe number 12 is free, I'd like breakfast in bed at 10:30 that's eggs, bacon, sausage and tomato's, with a wardorf salad washed down with lashings of hot screwdriver!
This Basils wife, This Basil, This, smack on head.

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Postieman — 9 years ago(June 10, 2016 01:44 AM)

Dr. Abbott: How often can you and your wife manage it?
Mrs Peignoir (coquettishly) I'm not having you knocking on my door in the middle of the night!
Basil (falsetto) Ha ha ha ha ha I should coco!

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HellaciousWonTon — 9 years ago(October 05, 2016 10:05 AM)

From the "Basil the Rat" episode:
Manuel: He no rat, he hamster.
Basil: Would youwould you care for a rat?

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reboard88 — 9 years ago(October 05, 2016 01:30 PM)

"Hello, Fawlty Titties"

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maydom04 — 9 years ago(October 13, 2016 04:08 PM)

A GIN AND ORANGE.A LEMON SQUASH.AND A SCOTCH AND WATER PLEASE!!!!

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maydom04 — 9 years ago(October 26, 2016 12:51 PM)

A gin and orange, a lemon squash and a scotch and Water PLEASE!!!

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Sparky1873 — 9 years ago(October 29, 2016 06:40 AM)

"..and tell me what you would expect to see from a Torquay hotel room?,..Sydney Opera House,wildebeest running majestically"

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kpetnews — 9 years ago(December 04, 2016 11:36 AM)

Sybil: It's Mrs. Richards.
Basil: A fatal accident?

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rsmith26524 — 9 years ago(January 05, 2017 09:21 PM)

In the Waldorf salad episode
American guy tell's Basil to "bust his ass" (about disciplining his chef)
Later Basil tell's the American guy that he "smashed his backside" (about disciplining his chef)

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deem_bastille — 9 years ago(January 07, 2017 10:16 AM)

is this a piece of your brain? is the ultimate best.
Ah, yes, Mr. O'Reilly. Well, it's quite simple. When I asked you to build me a wall, I was rather thinking that instead of just dumping the bricks in a pile, you might find time to cement them together one on top of the other in the traditional fashion.
Oh God. Fortune
vomits
on my eiderdown once more.