Oliver was a Terrible husband to Barbara
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LukeLovesFilm28 — 11 years ago(November 14, 2014 02:13 AM)
Yeah. Let's turn the tables here. People don't do that often enough today.
I'm sure a wife - who has dedicated her life to providing happiness to her husband and family would love it if she learned that her husband didn't want to come to see her at the hospital after she fell or had a possible heart attack. And when the husband says, "I was filled with relief when I thought you were dead," I'm sure the wife would not be overjoyed. In fact, I KNOW the wife would either be inconsolable or really pissed. Oliver's choice was to get really pissed. -
06986 — 10 years ago(July 23, 2015 10:00 PM)
OP is completely wrong, I just watched the movie again and it was even more clear that the wife was just awful, mean, vindictive, had mental issues, it was basically all her and the husband did not deserve her viciousness. Most men at times are inattentive and focus a little too much on a hobby, career, themselves, but in no way does that deserve the way she acted towards him. The Douglas character was not nasty to her, he was just a little insensitive when the wife was struggling like with the story. Nothing the Michael Douglas character came close to deserving to be treated the way he was by the wife even before he thought he was having a heart attack and they agreed to a divorce. The not going to see him was just cold and heartless and more or less indicative of mental issues. The way the wife acted is a clear case of severe mental issues/depression that had nothing with her husband.
-Look at the way she teases and treats the husbands dog
-She sneers at Douglas just for the way he laughs
-She throws a tantrum and turns on all the appliances when Douglas is trying to talk to a client.
-She smacks him in the face with her contract and then when the husband was playing around and initiating sex she puts him in a leg lock to injure him.
-When she finds out her husband may be in serious medical trouble and then is doing better she never bothers to go and be with him at the hospital and is happy at the thought of him being dead and no longer in her life.
-She then plugs his nose when he is trying to sleep in order to wake him/maybe kill him and then tells him she wished he was dead, does not love him, and wants a divorce, then when he rightfully keeps asking her why and what her problem is she socks him in the face drawing blood.
-She then uses a letter he wrote to her thinking he was going to die just so she can get the house in a divorce.
After all this is when Michael Douglas starts getting back at her but still he wants to make amends with her, still tries at times to be civil with her while she is absolutely miserable, he still tells her he loves her and even after she tries to kill him that he thinks she looks great where she just says she wants him out of the house and makes him believe she killed his dog and made patte of it.
She is absolutely rotten to the core and the husband did not deserve any of her venom. -
lrdcharlton — 10 years ago(July 26, 2015 12:32 PM)
I wholeheartly agree with you, I cannot fathom how anyone could say he was worse than she was or that there wass equal blame. So, what she does for twenty years is sit and seeth about minor things her husband does and does not say anything about it. To me, it seemed like she was jealous that he was successful in something outside the home while she spent most of her time caring for the children and decorating the house. If she wanted to have a career in catering she could have started before the kids were grown and she felt unfulfilled. She sat by and internalized everything and allowed it to build to the point she hated him with a passion. He had his moments of coming across like a smug jerk but it was never done out of malice or spite.She is the one at fault for not doing much with her life and sitting by silently, while he ignorantly went on doing things she did not like. Most o the things she did were low and spitful. He killed her cat accidently because she wouldnt give him any sleep aid, so she locks him in a sauna. She violently attacks him unprovocked, several times. She was an overall B#tch if you ask me. Oliver did have his faults, like thinking he was right about everything and turning out to be wrong, ocassionally downplaying her hopes for her career and stooping down to her level when things went wrong during the separation and divorece. But I do not think he would have done those things if she acted like a reasonable adult. It was also her fault she didnt get the house.
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LukeLovesFilm28 — 10 years ago(December 06, 2015 01:47 PM)
Unfortunately, I think this movie has a lot more relevance today than it did in the '80s. I think relationships between men and women are reaching a massive breaking point. I mean, Danny DeVito and his wife, Rhea Perlman recently broke up. If they can't stay together, I worry that no one can. People should watch this movie and try to learn a thing or two about communication, tolerance, acceptance, compassion, love, etc.
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06986 — 10 years ago(August 08, 2015 12:59 PM)
You have to be insane to think Oliver was anywhere near as bad as Barbara. There was no contest or comparison between the two of them. Please name exactly how Oliver was bad or anywhere near as bad before she said she wanted a divorce and socked him in the mouth after not bothering to visit him in the hospital when he thought he was dying. Being a little arrogant and dismissive is the way most men are and not a big deal. She had serious anger and mental issues when they had that original dinner and she was trying to tell the story which she was ruining and Oliver helped her. From then on it was basically all her. Nothing Oliver did deserved that kind of reaction from her or resentment, it was just that she grew to hate everything about him even if much of it was not bad like the way he chewed his food, laughed, etc while Oliver still loved her.
Oliver never tried to really hurt her or injure her where she on several cases physically hurt him and even tried to kill him(punching him, throwing a pot and hitting him, gripping him and squeezing hard with her thighs, locking him in the steam room, running over his car with him in it, biting his pecker and then sliding him down a hole in the attic to the floor, trying to drop a chandelier on him. The only thing Oliver did was chase her and throw a chair at what he thought was her which was at the end with all the terrible things she did to him. Even when Oliver hit the statue with the crowbar and a piece hit her he ran up and tried to comfort her and said he was sorry and she just used that as a opportunity to again injure him and try to throw him down the stars.
It was 90-95% Barbara and maybe 5-10% Oliver, how could anyone not see that and think it was even close to even. Just because he refused to be kicked out of his own house and lose the house he worked and paid for does not make him as bad as Barbara. -
LukeLovesFilm28 — 10 years ago(August 16, 2015 03:10 PM)
Here's the thing a lot of these man-hating feminists today don't get. If Oliver was bad in any way, it wasn't conscious choice. He didn't wake up one day and say, "I'm going to make my wife feel like she's nothing, like she's beneath me just to gain power over her." MOST men in the civilized world don't think like this. Oliver reacted to her choices. He became more and more bitter with the way she was handling things, because she was not allowing him to have any choice. Look what happened with the kids. She stuffed them full of garbage and they got fat. That's exactly what Oliver knew was going to happen and didn't want for his kids. Does his perspective matter at all in this household? We see him overcompensate later in life as he lifted himself up, patted himself on the back. On the other hand, Barbara wasn't really being abused. She had EVERYTHING, all provided for her by Oliver and all of his hard work. He made fun of her but nothing like her. By underhandedly mocking her patte business, that really isn't abuse. Barbara - like a lot of feminists out there, chose to see this as oppression and she CHOSE to not love Oliver anymore. Oliver didn't choose to be an a$$hole. He was reactionary. That means despite his cold demeanor, his heart was in the relationship the whole time. Barbara got a selfish bug up her ass and chose to fight and hate Oliver.
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lizcarlo87 — 10 years ago(December 28, 2015 11:02 AM)
They were both jerks. How anyone can say either is good is beyond me. They are both terrible people. She is crazy women. I think its been inside her all along. It just never came out until the gloves came off. Anyone who thinks Oliver is good guy is more in likely just like him. The Oliver's of the world are poisonous its just not obvious until you have relationship with those women/men with that type of personality. They are draining.
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LukeLovesFilm28 — 9 years ago(December 07, 2016 08:26 PM)
Olivers are poisonous?? WTF? How so? Because he's not kissing her ass, emotionally AND financially 24/7? Why does a man have to do everything in a relationship, from making the money to supporting his wife emotionally while a woman gets to act like a total selfish cnt whenever it suits her??
When your wife continually calls you "Fck face" for the dumbest infractions, eventually you're going to stop caring. Was he calling her filthy, hateful names before she went full psycho? NO. He was far more tolerant of her bullsh!t than she ever was for him.
Get off your soapbox while I play you a tune on the tiniest violin. -
rascal67 — 9 years ago(December 10, 2016 06:07 AM)
Barbara was just a materialistic and spoiled narcissist and she was given what she wanted. They both got what they wanted at the start and while Oliver could be patronizing at times, Barbara still had choices and opportunities to do something different with her life, rather than just decide to hate on her husband who was largely responsible for giving her the things she wanted. She wasn't a ball and chain and while she did what she did to please him in the beginning, there was nothing stopping her from asserting her energies into a career later on, instead of channeling her hatred and aggressiveness at Oliver. She did some vile, mean and spiteful things, and if I recall, what did Oliver do that could be considered worse, piss in her pate and ruin her dinner party with drunken behavior. Whatever! She was devious and underhanded.
Don't eat the whole ones! Those are for the guests.