Rachel is too good for Ross, Monica (and everyone else) is too good for Chandler the girls have just as many, and I wou
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Archived from the IMDb Discussion Forums — Friends
alexaw9 — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 05:23 AM)
Rachel is too good for Ross, Monica (and everyone else) is too good for Chandler the girls have just as many, and I would say more, actually, flaws than the guys, but somehow they're better? I'm watching the episode right now TOW the Videotape, and it bugs me how no one thinks Rachel could have possibly hit on Ross first instead of the other way around, and especially how Rachel treats Ross like it was so ridiculous that she could have hit on him first (even though she did).
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Painbow — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 06:35 AM)
Men want sex more than women.
Ergo, women get hit on constantly (whether blatantly or with more subtlety) and this creates a sense of expectation for them. "
All men want me so I must be amazing
." In turn, this leads to a unjustified and false sense of superior worth as a potential partner.
The good news is it doesn't.
Put a vagina on sandwich and men will want that too. -
ppllkk — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 08:07 AM)
alexaw9
wrote:
the girls have just as many, and I would say more, actually, flaws than the guys, but somehow they're better?
Oh yes, they certainly do.
I have a suspicion that when people say the women are too good for the men that they end up with, what they are really thinking is that the women are better looking than the men and so they could get a "better" husband in the sense of a better looking one or one with more money.
But they know that is an extremely shallow way of thinking, and so they hide their thinking behind "too good for" which is vague enough that it could mean anything. -
Wildstyle26 — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 08:15 AM)
Going with this. It seems it's more about looks. If you look good, the world is at your feet. You have more dating prospects, job prospects. Good looking people just have edge.
Usually I hear "She's out of his league." I consider leagues to include the entire package. But for many, leagues are about looks. So going by looks alone, Rachel is out of Ross' league. And Chandler is too fat and bleh for the hotter Monica.
The same thing happens with the
King of Queens
fandom. Some who insist that Carrie is out of Doug's league. But really Carrie is just hot. She's got nothing else going for her other than her looks, and not even that when the actress has the baby weight on her from her pregnancy, and became more frumpy.
But it's typical on tv. Media seems to be biased toward men. Men wanna see hot women, so naturally the hotter women tend to get most of the roles. But on the flip, men's looks don't seem to be scrutinized as much as women. So average-looking men could get as many parts as hotter men, because it doesn't seem as cared about.
That's why the Ugly Guy, Hot Wife tropes seems to abundant.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/UglyGuyHotWife
Like I said in another thread. This show had plenty of very attractive women. The men usually were all dumpy to average at best. -
alexaw9 — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 08:41 AM)
I agree that that's the reasoning behind it, but it doesn't make it right or okay. I think it bugs me more on Friends than something like King of Queens because Friends on the whole is more realistic, less sitcom-y. The characters feel like they could be real people (up until some of them become caricatures). So for them to be so shallow and condescending, and most especially towards people that they consider to be some of their best friends, is really irritating.
That's probably why it also irritates me that they all make fun of/act obnoxiously bored with anything Ross mentions about his job or intelligence in general though that is less annoying; I chalk it up to less intelligence on the part of the other friends (not necessarily dumb, just not interested in learning).
But the way they treat the men vs the women, some of their best friends, really annoys me. By the way, Chandler was only chunky in a couple of seasons, and even then, he wasn't bad-looking. And seemingly the men, especially Chandler and Ross, were pretty selfless, while the women, with the exception of Monica sometimes, were very selfish. They were certainly not 'better'. -
alexaw9 — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 12:18 PM)
Yes, it bugs me too. And it especially bugs me that everyone saying it are people that are part of the five other 'Friends', people that are supposed to be his best friends in the world. Even Monica has voiced that opinion at least once.
None of the guys are unattractive, and if anything, in terms of Ross and Rachel, he is settling for her. -
ppllkk — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 02:23 PM)
alexaw9
wrote:
if anything, in terms of Ross and Rachel, he is settling for her.
Yes, Ross is "settling" for what looked good to him in high school not always when we have our best judgment.
Ross is no longer a high school nerd. At the beginning of the series, Ross is a PhD in paleontology; by the end of the series he is a tenured professor at NYU. He could've done a lot better. -
alexaw9 — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 04:43 PM)
Well, I don't think judging by career is much better than looks. What I meant by him settling for her (in some respects) is that even though he can be whiny and he can be an entitled brat (mainly just between him and Monica), he is such a kind, sweet, selfless, loyal person, in relationships and in friendships. Rachel got in the way a lot, but he gave everything to Carol for years, he was willing to give up everything for Emily, he just cared so much. Rachel is a very selfish, spoiled, self-obsessed person, making bad decisions like flying to London to tell Ross she loves him, or convincing Bonnie to shave her head, in the name of "love". She really only wants Ross when he's not available. She can be entertaining as one of the friends, but I think she is not a good person. Ross definitely deserves better, someone who appreciates his love instead of just feeling entitled to it.
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ppllkk — 9 years ago(June 13, 2016 09:28 AM)
timmysdf
wrote:
i just think it is funny that he/she cherry picked rachel's worst moments
Rachel's worst moments stretched over seven years.
and then acted like ross never did terrible things himself
What terrible things did Ross do that are in any way comparable to what Rachel did.
Rachel did not want Ross, but she did not want another woman to have him. She did not want him, but she would not let him go. Rachel always left Ross a little bit of hope that maybe, some time . . . She reinforced this idea by occasionally having sex with him. And she did it for seven years.
So just what did Ross did do other than love Rachel and not want to lose her. And be a fool about what Rachel is really like. -
imaneassi — 9 years ago(June 12, 2016 07:54 PM)
Actually Ross is the one who claimed to love her all these years, did nothing about it till he saw her with Paolo. Rachel flying to London to tell him she loves him wasn't horrible. Horrible would have been if she had actually told him her supposed feelings and tried to stop him. Instead Rachel did absolutly nothing. She congratulated him and watched him marry Emily.Ross didn't find out why she was there till later. All characters are flawed but Ross was plain unrootable, failed big time a romantic lead
