Has anyone had a sexual harassment problem at work?
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englisher101 — 13 years ago(July 30, 2012 09:24 AM)
I work at a restaurant and one of the dishwashers(male) would whistle when some waitresses and bartenders(female) walked by.
That shouldn't be considered sexual harassment. Admiring someone for their looks isn't the same as making sexual advances. It's not even discriminatory as far as I'm concerned; it's not like the dishwashers were in any position of power to determine the future of these waitresses.
I(male) personally only really experienced it once when a co-worker(female) casually asked me if I ever had sex.
I also fail to see how this is sexual harassment. It might have been too candid a conversation for your comfort, but this was just a friendly conversation between two co-workers from what I gather. It's not like your job was on the line; it's not like this question was being asked during a job interview. -
mark6785 — 13 years ago(August 31, 2012 10:39 AM)
sexual harrassment isnt just when your career is being affected Englisher101
theres many different forms:- career held back cos you didnt put out
- constant "compliments" of nice tits! etc
- aggressive behaviour because of rejection from 2)
- i'm sure theres other manifestations i cant think of right now
I watched "He was a quiet man" the other day. He got threatened with harrassment because he looked down a cleavage. (probly wuldnt have held up, mind)
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englisher101 — 13 years ago(November 05, 2012 07:36 PM)
Understood, but especially if we take this one:
"co-worker(female) casually asked me if I ever had sex. I was uncomfortable with that question so I told her assertively that the question was unwelcome and and I didn't have a problem with her later."
^^ I can't possibly see how this is sexual harassment in any way whatsoever. If it's even in a gray area then I think we might as well avoid all form of social interaction at work. -
Darkfalz1979 — 12 years ago(July 06, 2013 11:52 AM)
I commonly hear conversations between women at work that would be reportable or even grounds for dismissal if those same conversations were held between men. Interesting indeed, the hysteria around sexual harassment / assault is completely focused around the male perp / female victim model and excludes virtually everything else.
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manofsteel4455 — 12 years ago(August 09, 2013 10:21 PM)
I don't understand how guys can be uncomfortable with this kind of stuff..Unless they're complete nerds who've never had much interaction with females before.
You want to play the game, you'd better know the rules, love.
-Harry Callahan -
Darkfalz1979 — 12 years ago(August 20, 2013 12:01 PM)
I don't understand how guys can be uncomfortable with this kind of stuff..Unless they're complete nerds who've never had much interaction with females before.
I am uncomfortable with the fact women can say this and get away with it, but I'd likely be counselled or fired for it. It's the double standard that irks me. -
borabosna-625-510324 — 10 years ago(November 10, 2015 11:52 AM)
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tcw214 — 12 years ago(December 13, 2013 07:48 PM)
i was ACCUSED of it on 2 levels..
my work area. is a PRIVATE work area.. and i have naked girls on motorcycles , some from magazines, some are ex-girlfriends or models on bikes i built.
so
#1)
a coworker from a different department.. indeed a separate BUILDING, demanded the boss make me take them down.. i told them both "NOPE, no chance. YOU dont work in here.. no one is FORCING YOU to look at them. if fact.. youre not even WELCOME in here. its MY work area.. and they are MY motivation. now get the f#ck out."
#2)
2 weeks later the above coworker told the boss and lawyer that i had harassed her in my work area after i invited her over for lunch.
the boss told me i was fired. and to pack my stuff .. the lawyer was talking crap about me being sued..etc etc.
so i simply asked " what day?"
and all 3 had HUH? look on their faces..
"WHAT DAY AND TIME DID THIS TAKE PLACE? you see its simple.. i have 5 cameras in and around my work area to catch the f#@ker that stole some tools a year ago.. they run 24/7/365.
so.. any business with ANYONE is on record!! so? WHAT DAY??"
the bitch was fired ,the lawyer bought me diner at the palm, my BOSS was fired and i got a raise.
in this day and age, never assume you are not being watched. -
Darkfalz1979 — 11 years ago(December 23, 2014 12:52 AM)
I'm female, so it's happened to me, like most females.
By this I take it you have admitted to harassing someone? Or are you admitting to falsely accusing someone of harassment for petty payback or career advancement? -
Splarne — 10 years ago(August 05, 2015 12:52 PM)
i never thought it could happen to me at all. in my position, i'm unlikely to get a female manager (not a historically balanced career). i am also unlikely to have any direct reports, so none for me to harass realistically.
the way our company is structured, we get a new boss every 4 years or so. 3 years ago, we were getting a new boss. in the limbo time from the previous one getting transferred to the new one, the office admin assistant who i'd seen be very flirty with many co-workers, requested a massage (at the office even) from me. i refused. her response was ridicule. the next morning, we were the only two at the office, she barged into my office to "show me her sunburn" which she'd gotten on her breasts. out they came. i immediately said i was not interested in looking, she was insistent that i "LOOK!". the comments from her that week made me think she was in panic mode about having a new boss and the potential that he would want to change personnel. i felt like i was being set up, so after talking with another employee, i contacted HR.
that person came to our office and interviewed me and a few other people, actually, many other people because i named names of the ones she'd been very flirty with because i knew they weren't receptive to her either. it turned out that she'd been trying to get guys over to her house during lunch to "help her move furniture". the HR person was dismissive of me in the end explaining that this woman was just happy to have lost weight and was feeling a newfound confidence. yeah. great. in retrospect, the HR person and the admin assistant were overly friendly.
Go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!