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  3. 100 THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM u00c0 l'intérieur *MASSIVE SPOILERS*

100 THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM u00c0 l'intérieur *MASSIVE SPOILERS*

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    #32

    E-Kartoffel — 12 years ago(September 09, 2013 02:35 PM)

    1. French homes can be quite foggy.
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      Abbie_Normal_14 — 15 years ago(November 13, 2010 11:37 PM)

      Dang, I wrote out 12 things I learned after watching this movie, but y'all beat me to the punch on half of them (and came up with lots of other good ones!).
      My other six
      101. French nurses are dispassionate twats.
      102. In France, they tell survivors of car accidents that there were no other survivors for no apparent reason.
      103. French people keep bookshelves next to bathroom doors that are conveniently, exactly the right height to block the handle from turning.
      104. Bathroom doors in France are sound-proofed (even when full of holes), so if you're locked inside, don't bother screaming when your boss or the cops are downstairs.
      105. French women have perfect aim when swinging knitting needles and other sharp objects at jugular veins and eye sockets, especially in panic situations.
      106. A lot of people wrongly believe that this movie was better than Martyrs.

      • my other six that were already said -
      1. French fetuses do really good impressions of Macaulay Culkin.
      2. French police officers do not receive any training in basic self defense or proper ways of subduing & cuffing murderers.
      3. French women can't recognize the sound of their own Mother's voice (I guess that's because their bathroom doors are sound-proofed).
      4. Teenagers stare quietly at slow-moving, knife-wielding murderers rather than flailing or screaming or kicking or showing any other such survival instincts.
      5. Similarly, when someone sprays fire in your face, it's best to hold perfectly still for several seconds instead of pulling away as quickly as possible.
      6. French police officers wait 10 minutes before calling for backup or an ambulance while inside a "war zone".
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        SpiritedAway86 — 14 years ago(May 21, 2011 03:48 PM)

        "110. Teenagers stare quietly at slow-moving, knife-wielding murderers rather than flailing or screaming or kicking or showing any other such survival instincts."
        Sorry maybe my mind just isn't working now but what is #110 in reference to? What teenager? I don't remember any teenager in this movie.

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          scyza — 14 years ago(July 10, 2011 10:26 AM)

          I think he meant that kid the police men had arrested. For some reason they took him with them into the house if you remember.

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            #36

            cyril_twistedmettle — 14 years ago(November 04, 2011 08:30 AM)

            1. French women like punching glass
            2. French homicidial bitch maniacs have 'jolie-lips'
              113.French people get stabbed in the head a lot. A LOT
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              fuchsiasattic — 14 years ago(January 17, 2012 04:54 PM)

              1. Psychopathic baby stealing women are easy to spot, if you know what to look for. They generally dress up as witches who have escaped from a Renaissance faire.
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                Bash_McNasty — 14 years ago(February 29, 2012 12:43 AM)

                1. The ridiculous things:minutes ratio in this movie is actually greater than 1:1, which may be a new record.
                  Agree that throughout all this, I still give it a 9/10 as one of my favorite horror movies. It's almost like Dead Alive (Braindead) by Peter Jackson in terms of how bad it is yet still amazingly entertaining.
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                  #39

                  JustGotReel — 13 years ago(April 07, 2012 03:36 PM)

                  1. Restraining suspects in such a way that they can't kill you with concealed weapons is a secret technique, known only by 12th Dan karate masters
                  2. French bathroom doors are thin as plywood but have the soundproofing qualities of acoustical tiles
                  3. Calling for backup is a major faux pas
                  4. Maternal fury trumps police training, always
                  5. When you've cornered your tormentor listen to her explanation, she may have a valid reason for killing everyone
                  6. If she has one leave her be and go hang out with zombie cop
                  7. Zombie cops make bad midwives
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                    #40

                    icaptainchaos — 12 years ago(June 09, 2013 02:29 AM)

                    1. If a gappy toothed, darkly dressed woman knocks on your door at late o'clock telling you that she wants your baby, it's probably not true.
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                      Sally_Hardesty — 11 years ago(July 20, 2014 03:30 AM)

                      #124.. Johnny Depp's baby mama's sister is not the actress with the matching gap in her teeth, but instead is the pretty actress playing the pregnant woman. Who knew?

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                        #42

                        michmcclane — 11 years ago(August 06, 2014 11:58 AM)

                        1. Apparently, all cops in France are trained at the "Inspector Jacques Clouseau Police Academy" where they are taught multiple topics including but not limited to:
                          Basic based-on-blind-luck survival techniques.
                          Proper suspect handling and police procedure.
                          English pronuntiation with words as "pheun" instead of "phone".
                          Basic CPR that somehow could turn you into a zombie.
                          Among many others.
                          ECLIPSING POWER IS, AT TIMES, NOT ONLY THE INSTRUMENT OF DEMONS BUT ALSO OF GODS
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                          #43

                          moisan4 — 10 years ago(April 24, 2015 10:37 PM)

                          1. Give yourself a tracheotomy to breathe, and then close up the hole to stop bleeding. Even though, this would also make breathing impossible again, since your throat is still crushed, and the hole is closed. This defeats the whole purpose of stabbing a huge hole in throat in the first place.
                            This actually made me groan out loud. No "twist" ending could save this gorefest POS.
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