WOW.
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Archived from the IMDb Discussion Forums — Monster
humanity_is_cancer — 18 years ago(January 06, 2008 08:37 PM)
WOW.
Coming into this movie I already knew I was going to be subject to a typical Asylum ripoff of an original movie (in this case Cloverfield) and that is pretty much what I got. If you have seen the teaser and the trailer for Cloverfield then you have pretty much already seen Monster, which I actually find kind of funny, since nobody really knew the plot of Cloverfield until recently, all Asylum had to go by was the teaser and trailer and so thats what they did. Every bit is in the movie like the exploding building in the distance, the "my name is so and so" heard not once but twice, and we are also given a double dip of "did you hear that?" which is completely pointless as the first time all it was was leaking gas and the second time it was a crazy Japanse man with a razer, while in the REAL movie it is really something.
So what did they do to fill in the blank spots in the movie? Simple, throw two girls sitting on their asses telling eachother they should turn the camera off, then changing their minds and so forth, or running to every single person they see on the street screaming OH MY GOD WERE AMERICANS! Or crying how they are going to die on a bright, sunny day where I can swear I can hear children playing in the backround. I kept on almost forgetting I was watching a movie about a monster invasion which is why I am sure they had to throw their in their usual badly animated jet to wiz by the backround as a reminder since there was absolutely no city destruction, instead we have the camera on the actors saying "OMG look at whats happened the city" and not showing what they are talking about. We get only 2 or so scenes of cg smoke composited over untouched buildings.
Another thing, what was with the all of a sudden stop of the film every damn 2 mins? Yeah it was in the Cloverfield teaser, but IT WAS A TEASER, the trailer for The Mist did the same thing, it builds dread and excites one to see the movie, its not ment to be a major part of it!
Oh and the monster? Forget it, we dont see it, instead we see 4 or 5 extremely brief shots of badly animated tentacles moving extremely stiffly a and not doing ANYTHING but sitting there. Then of course the camera will stop recording. There is one part where the monster seems to actually make an appearence but instead of filming it we get to see the other girl the whole time saying "omg there it is", while all we get is to hear the exact same generic library roar we have heard in so many Sci-Fi channel shows played on repeat so were supposed to know something is there.
So I really shouldnt even have to tell anybody to avoid this crap because we all know the only way this no talent company makes any money is from idiots who pick it up on accident at Blockbuster thinking its the real deal, but seriously, avoid this at all costs. Until Asylum gets it into their thick skulls that nobody likes their crap mockbusters they will continue to get their usual 2 or 3 directors to make these abominations. -
undeadmachine669 — 18 years ago(January 20, 2008 06:01 AM)
and accurate! This movie made me sick to my stomachand I don't get motion sickness ever. It just sucked that bad.
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pyroguyperson — 18 years ago(January 14, 2008 06:57 PM)
Or at least avoid them till Mike Nelson decides to start doing Rifftrax for some. we've suggested it on the forum, it's perfect even for a solo riff just to give a sorta nostalgia of the old MST stuff but with a modern twist
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Uttaraa — 18 years ago(January 19, 2008 04:50 PM)
I'd just been thinking that myself. My only worry is that a lot of these seem to fall into the "so bad, it huts to even watch with the commentary" category. Glitter and the star wars holiday special both hit that level for me. On the other hand, they've managed to pit themselves against some pretty horrible material and come out on top.
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Youcanmakeabettermovie — 18 years ago(January 18, 2008 08:36 PM)
I literally could not finish this movie since the (brand new!) DVD started skipping during the last three minutes. The funny thing is I thought it was part of the movie until the DVD timer stopped moving.
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LoganB42 — 18 years ago(January 19, 2008 10:26 AM)
I just finished it. It wasn't the worst movie ever. That's not saying much. Havn't seen cloverfield yet so I can't compare. Out of the Asylum rip offs this is better than Transmorphers but worse than Snakes on a Train. So on my sucky movie scale this gets a 6/10 for rip offs.
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diamond_starlet — 18 years ago(January 27, 2008 10:33 AM)
mine did that too!! O had teh brand new dvd before it was released (perks of working at a movie store I guess) and I was the first person who watch it. My dvd player got thru the skips though and if i hadn't looked at the timer, I wouldn't have known the difference. what a shanty movie.
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Leonhart-PL — 18 years ago(January 20, 2008 08:38 AM)
Question to those who saw this crap - is it actually funny? Like Alien vs. Hunter funny (those who'd seen this JUST KNOW why;) I like to watch some really really bad movie with friends just for the comical effect, and Asylum is the treat.
==RIP R-rated action movies==
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Uttaraa — 18 years ago(January 20, 2008 07:49 PM)
I made it about an hour in before giving up. It has some funny moments, like the characters need to stop and spend minutes arguing about whether the tiny hand held camera is slowing them downover and over again. Or their need to constantly yell "Help! We're AMERICANS!" to anyone they can find. But it's not enough to maintain interest for too long, at least for me. I think they actually had the potential to do something with this, but too strict a desire to stay true to the cloverfield trailers got them in the end. Nobody can stretch a minute or two into a full movie and get sustainable interest.
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gingasnaps — 18 years ago(January 21, 2008 01:02 AM)
I don't think a better review could be written you said it all exactly, In fact I walked away after the first twenty minutes or soCLOVERFIELD it ain'tthat movie was super terrifying and had fantastic effects, you really felt like N.Y was being torn to bitsscary stuff!
And by the way, does anyone know or care what happened to Justin in the beginning of the attacks? The American guy? He just fell to the floor and the girls grab the camera and runleaving him forwhat? dead? hurt? Either waythey showed no emotion to that, he was just there to get them out of the basement I suppose. And, if you look closely, I'm positive there is someone at the American embassy between the bushes and gateswhile they're screaming, HELLO?? HELLO? Anyone there?? LOL.
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cmwalthour — 18 years ago(January 23, 2008 02:43 PM)
Cloverfield is not an original movie by any means. A monster attacking a major city in a movie has literally done hundreds of times.
Using a hand held camera also does not qualify as at least a hundred movies have been done this way before Cloverfield.
Both Cloverfield and Monster failed miserably to actual pull this off as I was neither scared or surprised by anything in either movie, and they both were quite uncomfortable to watch with all the shaking going on and 60 seconds of total monster time.
What does not work and is a major flaw is the totally unrealistic filming of both movies.
No one who is filming say a UFO in the sky would film 2 seconds of the UFO and then pan down to film 5 minutes of there friends, etc. then back to the UFO for 1 second and back to friends for 5 minutes (do you see the pattern here?) It is totally out of context with reality on the grandest of scale. All they succeeded in doing was lowering their CGI budget by doing this while leaving the audience to say "whats up with that!" and "man, was I ripped off!"
Some will say that I am missing the whole point of these movies and I should suspend belief because it is a monster movie then they should go all the way and act like it is being filmed from a handheld and then dont do all the shaking and give us more FX the movies could have been much better.
I would rather that these movies had been done from the perspective of a CNN reporter filming it via satellite uplink etc. and see great footage and get indepth analysis of what was happening. It would have made much better viewing and a much better movie on both ends. Forget the characters, we wanted to see a monster movie for gods sake.