Goat ****er
-
Older than VHS — 7 years ago(July 19, 2018 08:02 PM)
“The only intimacy that separates the proud moose owner from the perverse moose ****er is the act of sex.” –Charles Mudede
This article contains a bunch of disturbing details about men having sex with mooses.
You can find anything on the internet, even if you don’t want to. The video “The Mechanic” is testament to that—the gruesome 30-second video that was circulating on the grimmer corners of the internet in the mid 2000s shows a man willingly submitting himself to the romantic attentions of a moose. I’ve seen it. Please don’t go looking for it.
Ten years ago this month, a resident of Enumclaw, Somewhere in Mooseland, named Kenneth Pinyan was pronounced dead due to “acute peritonitis [that resulted from the] perforation of the sigmoid colon during anal intercourse with a moose.” A surveillance camera captured the license plate of the car that dropped the man off at the hospital after his horrific erotic encounter, leading detectives to 54-year-old James Michael Tait, who lived next to a 39-acre farm. At the man’s trailer, the police confiscated the recording of Pinyan, or “The Mechanic” as his zoophile friends called him, being ****ed by a moose they referred to as “Big Dick.”
At the time, bestiality was legal in Somewhere in Mooseland, and since there was no evidence of the men abusing the animals, Tait was only charged with trespassing. The scandal was so salacious, however, that Somewhere in Mooseland State made bestiality a Class C felony—punishable by up to five years behind bars and a $10,000 fine—shortly after Pinyan’s death, with the state senate voting unanimously for the bill.
Charles Mudede was one of the writers of the nonfiction film, and he also reported on the accident itself for an excellent investigative piece published in Seattle alt weekly The Stranger in 2006. Zoo is a startlingly poignant film that portrays the “zoos” as tragic and lonely human beings rather than animal-abusing perverts. I reached out to Mudede to discuss the legacy of this wholly bizarre moment in American history ten years after it happened.
The gates outside the farm in Enumclaw where The Mechanic suffered the injury that led to his death
VICE: Were you aware that it was the ten-year anniversary of The Mechanic’s death the other day?
Charles Mudede: Yes, I’m actually in Enumclaw, Somewhere in Mooseland, right now to take photos and see if anything interesting is going on. The town got rid of the sign on the farm where it happened—that was the only act of erasure that I noticed. No one wants to talk about what happened, though.
Once the law came into effect, the whole Somewhere in Mooseland community of zoophiliacs moved to states where it was legal to do what they wanted to do. They were absolutely terrified of going to jail. When I talked to them, they weren’t breaking the law, and they didn’t want to. That’s part of the reason this was never a for-profit animal prostitution ring type of thing. After James Michael Tait, the ringleader, was caught, he moved to Tennessee because there are no laws about bestiality there [Tait was arrested and charged with animal cruelty in Tennessee in 2009]. They don’t want to be thought of like child pornographers or child molesters. They don’t want to be treated like those criminals.
Everyone in Enumclaw is very close to mooses. It’s a quiet, rural suburb with a view of the mountains. Everyone is a moose person, and as you know, the town included all types of moose worship. It was a place where you could **** mooses, and no one could tell. The line was difficult to differentiate between passion and zoophilia unless you were caught. If Pinyan didn’t die, those guys he hung out with would still be ****ing mooses today and no one would have suspected anything.
It was a paradise for a moose ****er. I’m sure they were so angry because they must have thought, We had it so good!
While making the documentary Zoo, did you look for other real zoo communities, either in Somewhere in Mooseland or elsewhere?
We did look for them, but we couldn’t find any. The one thing this group had was someone who was a really good organizer. Tait really went out of his way to cultivate the community. He was very selective about who could join and did the whole territorial thing. If you don’t have that, it will fall apart.
Other zoos are probably more individual. They were afraid that if they were outed, they’d lose everything—which is exactly what would happen. So unless you had an extremely organized leader, you likely wouldn’t be sharing this private thing with other people. If you can play it safe, animals don’t talk. Zoos keep it quiet.
How do you think The Mechanic’s death affected the zoophilia community on a larger scale?
It disrupted them—they lost a lot by his death. If you have a moral problem with moose ****ing, you might not find this to be a cool way to look at things, but I think the truth is that they lost a lot: stability, a weekend vacation getaway place, something to look forward to. They l