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  3. Favourite Diane insults or comebacks

Favourite Diane insults or comebacks

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      chasrich-1 — 17 years ago(June 17, 2008 01:51 AM)

      When Carla and Diane were competing as to who would make the better waitress, Diane suggests that they each give a speech why and asks Carla to speak first-
      "Carla, the floor is yours, and not for the first time, I might add."

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          daisyap — 16 years ago(November 20, 2009 08:52 AM)

          Dave Richards:I'm incredibly rich, incredibly good looking
          Sam:And incredibly married
          Diane:Oh I'm sorry to hear that
          Dave:Really?
          Diane: Yes I was hoping to reject you based solely on your personality
          Love that one too!
          Sam: I'll think of something.
          Diane: Well I don't know what.
          Sam: You don't have my brain.
          Diane: Well whoever has it should return it.
          Diane: If brains were money you'd have to take out a loan to buy a cup of coffee!
          Carla: Bowlers don't sweat, Diane.
          Diane: They do if they're wearing tweed!
          Diane: Mr Kramer, you made a wonderful gesture to these people and now they're asking you to repeat it.
          Sam: You do that to me every night.
          Diane: I'm waiting for you to get it right.

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            hodie — 16 years ago(January 02, 2010 11:37 AM)

            Sam and Diane are sniping at each other:
            Sam: At least MY dates don't count the number of letters in sentences!
            Diane: Your dates can't FORM sentences.
            Honour thy parents. They were hip to the groove too once you know.

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              youmeathead — 16 years ago(March 16, 2010 10:16 AM)

              This was one of my favorite Diane comebacks:
              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8ZpsumdhfE&feature=related#t=5m15s
              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KKvbFgMK0E&feature=related#t=15s

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                sjmor60 — 14 years ago(June 11, 2011 01:25 PM)

                Diane: Oh, my Sammy is putting on his thinking cap! It's a wee, pointy little thing with ear-flaps!

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                  SweaterCannons — 13 years ago(December 04, 2012 04:50 PM)

                  Diane (to Heather): That's Carla, she likes witty repartee. She's just not capable of it.

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                    #14

                    justitia — 13 years ago(February 14, 2013 12:45 AM)

                    From the second episode of the first season (first show after the pilot):
                    (after the two are arguing about the kind of women Sam dates)
                    Sam
                    :(in a comeuppance tone) Well.. uhh, I've never met an intelligent woman I would
                    want
                    to date!
                    Diane
                    : On behalf of the intelligent women around the world, may I just say:
                    pheww
                    !
                    I saw this episode (and the whole first five years) when it first played 30 years ago a time when "intelligent women" were just beginning to be acknowledged as existing, here and there and I never forgot that line.

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                      eyebrowmorroco — 12 years ago(April 04, 2014 11:15 PM)

                      Diane:
                      How would you like to take a flying leap up a knuckle sandwich?
                      Yankees Fan: Hah?
                      Diane:
                      You gather my inference.

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                        #16

                        Hey_Sweden — 10 years ago(September 09, 2015 09:31 AM)

                        Sam: Quiet. I'm thinking.
                        Diane: Somebody note the date and time.
                        What do you think this is, a signature? It's a way of life!

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