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  3. Wait, how does someone get caught doing this?

Wait, how does someone get caught doing this?

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    Archived from the IMDb Discussion Forums — Fred Willard


    billnadsley — 13 years ago(July 19, 2012 12:26 PM)

    I said this as a part of another thread, but I just realized it's a good enough topic on it's own, and I'm honestly curious. How do cops catch people doing this?
    I have to assume that cops go into these places and then, what, shine their flashlights around the theater at guys' groins individually to see if they're jerking it? Or, are there undercover porno cops who sit down next to guys, then stare at their crotch, just in case the guy whips it out? Hell, that sounds significantly crazier and more offensive than the dudes that are actually committing the "crime".
    Any undercover porno cops on the board care to contribute an answer? I can just imagine them getting their assignments in the morning. "Johnson and Richards, you guys are on porno duty today. Get out there and see how many boners you can bring down!" I'm sure those cops really think about how their time at the academy is really paying off now

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      ZetaTauri — 13 years ago(July 19, 2012 01:45 PM)

      How do cops catch people doing this?
      And why?? It's a victimless crime, unless you count the stains on the seatback in front of him.

      • Frank
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          vestdennis — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 01:45 AM)

          Gotta be a mistake. He was doing method acting for his current project The Yank"

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            jefgg — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 04:47 AM)

            How did he get caught? Because he isn't good at it. Anything worth doing is worth doing right.

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              blondemagic — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 11:20 PM)

              vestdennis- Too funny! 🙂

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                PremiereDame — 13 years ago(July 19, 2012 10:42 PM)

                Too funny OP! I may come back and read your post when I'm having a bad day. LMTAO (I'm from Texas)
                And aren't XXX movies intended to excite? No wonder California's economy is circling the drain. They waste time and money on entrapping some actor who's harming no one. I mean, it's not like there's a boy scout field trip visiting that joint.
                Way to go Jerry Brown. Keep 'up' the good work.

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                      Willie_B_Hardigan — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 01:41 AM)

                      You know what would have made more sense is if an employee or some other moviegoer caught Willard masturbating in the theater and decided to call the police, not having undercove7ecr cops stake out the place looking for people publicly pleasuring themselves (in an adult theater, I might add).
                      The guy was probably just looking for some excitement in his life, but just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
                      It makes me wonder if his wife isn't up to the challenge anymore. At least we know Willard is still sexually active at 70-something. Good for him!

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                        Splarne — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 07:46 AM)

                        clearly, there are some folks that have a different image of an adult movie theater.


                        Beware, too much nolan batman will stunt your puberty, this board is proof.

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                          billnadsley — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 07:55 AM)

                          I'm not sure what you mean by that why is it a silly question? I've never been to one, or even been in one, so I may very well have an incorrect picture of an adult theater.
                          Would you mind filling us all in, if you have experience, as to what image we're supposed to have? Not being a jerk, just curious.
                          Though to be perfectly honest, my original post WAS meant to be a bit of a sarcastic statement, not to be taken too seriously.

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                            jabariabramson — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 08:45 AM)

                            I have to say OP, I agree with tsco13, I read your post twice. That is one of the funniest one I have ever read, that last part is classic.
                            My guess, somebody tweeted abou5b4t it.

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                              PremiereDame — 13 years ago(July 20, 2012 10:56 PM)

                              Bump because this OP is funny as hell.

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                                billnadsley — 13 years ago(July 22, 2012 08:47 PM)

                                OP here Awww You all make me blush. Happy to bring a smile to you. Thanks for the kind words Can be rare on these boards sometimes!

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                                  Jason_Radley — 13 years ago(July 21, 2012 08:00 AM)

                                  The patron in front complained that Fred had buttered his popcorn.

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                                      Benedict_Cumberbatch — 13 years ago(July 22, 2012 06:41 PM)

                                      Good question.
                                      "Live on, love all, and let live" - River Phoenix.

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                                        lkroger — 13 years ago(July 24, 2012 06:21 PM)

                                        The police have a specially trained dog which is used for a preliminary screening. When they raid a place, they tell everyone to stay in their seats. Then the dog goes through the theater, sniffing the crotch of each patron and the back of the head of the guy sitting in front of him. If the dog barks, the police take a DNA swab and check for a genetic match. Can't argue with science.
                                        The ACLU has questioned whether this tactic constitutes a search without consent or authorization; however the courts have thus far turned back objections through the legal principle of the "clean hands doctrine". Seems that practioners of public onanism do not have clean hands. I speak metaphorically of course.

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                                          brefane — 13 years ago(July 28, 2012 12:03 PM)

                                          Did someone call the police and make a complaint? Seems unlikely.
                                          It makes me wonder why public tax funded libraries allow people to watch internet porn, accomadate them by putting blockers around the computor so no one else can see!! and were concerned about what Fred Willard is doing in an adult thetaer ????

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