Best Lines Ever
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doktordaoud — 20 years ago(October 09, 2005 06:00 PM)
"How'd you like to lose two feet off your nose?"
"What is 'kinky'?" "You're about to find out"
"Lawyersyou'd think I was divorcing them."
"That woman, is my kinda guy."
"Don't worry, they're good girls" "Yeah, less go find some bad ones"
Man, he HAD to write his own lines for the film. They were all to funny. -
motleycruefan — 14 years ago(February 01, 2012 02:53 AM)
When Matthew says "Oh, that poor daddy. You can't swing a dead cat around here without hitting a poor daddy."
I hurt myself laughing at that line
Hahahaha yerh that is brilliant.
It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious. Bill Hicks -
Flkysoh — 18 years ago(June 15, 2007 08:10 PM)
Overall the whole movie was scripted with a great sense of humor and read with a great sense of timing. The character interaction flowed (despite some clumsiness on behalf of Johnson and Moore) and the exchanges were great, "try to picture them with clothes on." Joseph Bologna is an outstanding leach. "I didn't mean to be a bastard" should be on Hallmark cards.
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doktordaoud — 18 years ago(September 02, 2007 10:42 PM)
"She's dead!" One my favorites when he's in the sand.
"Good morningor not"
"I can't do any kind of dancing that involves moving my body."
"Her name is Isabelle, which must be portugese for perpetual motion"
"And you can forget my wife!" -
terencefisher — 18 years ago(April 02, 2008 09:49 PM)
Themistocles67 said:
Call me an old romantic, but I love the "Will you forget me?" "The minute I die." line.
You're not alone. Gives me the warm fuzzies every time; very poignant. And no, I'm not being sarcastic. Love this movie.
Terence -
CosmiKismet72 — 17 years ago(May 01, 2008 11:10 PM)
Matthew: "Jennifer, you had a very bad dream"
Jennifer: "that we were making love?"
Matthew: "probablyit didn't happen"
Jennifer: "i know, i was there when it didn't"
Demi Moore: "just be yourself dad, she'll get over you"
Victor: "we made a pact.."
Matthew: "what if there's no phone at the beach?"
Victor: "who said anything about a beach?"
Matthew: "in case it happenedhaPPENS on the beach"
(as he nervously and vigorously grates carrots)
orix lady: "you will need these candles..how young is the girl? half your age?"
Matthew: "more than half"
orix lady: "take the whole box"
Victor: "so uh how old is he, 18? 19?"
Jennifer:"older.."
Victor: "what 22?"
Jennifer: "43"
Victor: "43!! that's obscene!"
The entire script is hilarious -
naveron — 16 years ago(July 21, 2009 07:09 PM)
I love when Valerie Harper visits Jennifer in the hospital at the end and she starts to worry and says "Am I on any life support systems?" Valerie Harper answers "Believe me, there's not a plug in here worth pulling."
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nafdu1984 — 15 years ago(July 10, 2010 03:23 PM)
i thought it was funny when bologna's character was talking to caine and he was lamenting over the fact his wife was trying to take half of everything in the divorce.
"half, that's what she wants, half! wish i had herpes!"
i don't care who you are, that's funny. -
Movie_Piranha_1979 — 15 years ago(July 23, 2010 01:44 PM)
One of my favourites:
Matthew Hollis: It was, quite simply, the worst night of my life, my embarrassment compounded by the fact that Victor had now slept with two out of the three members of my family.
Prostitute: What the beep are you doing?
Johnny: I'm gonna kill a bunch of people.