Did any victims/survivors watch this?
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ARH — 13 years ago(February 23, 2013 11:18 PM)
I'm a survivor of childhood sexual (as wells physical, emotional, and emotional) abuse. I watched this a few years ago. I rented it because I liked the Gregg Araki films I had seen previously. I was unaware the it was about abuse. I just thought it was a gay-themed drama. It's very different from Araki's earlier films!
This film is one of the only movies that ever game me nightmaes, and the only one that gave me nightmares as an adult. It really got under my skin. In spite of that, I'm glad I saw it. -
TheCineSinge — 12 years ago(August 02, 2013 05:47 PM)
I think the abuse I experienced was the reason I sought it out at about the age of 14. It certainly made some sort of resonance with me though I think I was too young to fully grasp it at the time.
I'm now 19 and have just finished re-watching it for the first time in over 5 years and it had a profound effect on me. -
dogluver1970 — 12 years ago(November 18, 2013 04:45 AM)
Gee, what an insight! At least I'd be able to handle being abused. If a creepy uncle touched me when I was 5, I'm pretty sure that wouldn't make me gay AND I would simply say "mommy, uncle touched my pee-pee and I didn't like it." and that would be it.
Just when you think you've seen the most ignorant posts on another internet board
Are you really THAT ignorant/uneducated, or just dumb and super insensitive (though if you're dumb, maybe you don't know how insensitive you're being).
Child molestation (man on boy) doesn't "make (the boy) gay," and often has little to do with sex - it's about power, control and a sick adult seeking unconditional love from someone, and who better than a child to give it?? (they're not stable enough to have healthy relationships with other adults). And by the way, about the same number of men (percentage-wise), who molest boys are heterosexual as they are homosexual. Just like a heterosexual man abusing a young girl isn't considered a "hetero" relationship, as a CHILD cannot give consent to a sexual relationship!!
Ugh, go read a book -
Gaze73 — 12 years ago(October 19, 2013 02:26 AM)
Well, first off, thanks for the answer; at least you tried, unlike the guy above. In regards to the first point, the film depicted the fisting act and Neil was doing it voluntarily and having fun. The man didn't force the kids to do anything and was very kind to them, so there would be no reason for them to feel threatened if they'd refused to perform the acts. Also, in RL scenarios oral sex is the most preferred act, and kids are used to sucking since birth. And if it's done to them, no harm done either, as even a 5 year old can enjoy some oral action down there.
As for anal, that is a whole different beast, and so are toddlers who can't even talk or remember what happened; of COURSE there is nothing even remotely close to consent possible. But that's irrelevant here because, the film depicted 8 year old boys, and most of the abused people IRL are also able to walk and talk by the time it's happened to them.
And I don't know why you would state I'm angry, just because I'm ignorant of the deep intricacies of psychosexual development. I'm a very calm person.
And don't waste time reading this line, it's just my pointless signature. -
ledo-lorena — 11 years ago(August 22, 2014 11:51 PM)
I have to disagree with what you said. How can I put this?
It doesn't matter he was 8 years old and "enjoyed" it. You have to realize pervs like that coach pray on children from unstable homes. Neil had no father and a beep mother so he was very needy and the coach filled that void.
At 8 years of age, they don't have full mental capacity to understand what is TRULY going on. Because he doesn't have the mental capacity to do so, he bases his experience on what the coach says about it. The coach says it is fun, then it must be fun. He trusted the coach, he felt special, the favourite.
In the end of the day, the child doesn't enjoy what he is doing, he enjoys the affection and attention the perv is giving him, So, he would enjoy fisting the coach just as much as he would enjoy going for a day at the beach or something like that.
It is not about what they do, it is about how coach made him feel.
Also, believing he enjoyed what was happening could very well be a psychological mechanism to deal with what was happening. Brian dealt with it by believing he had been abducted, but, deep inside, he knew what had truly happened all along, neil, on the other hand, dealt with it by believing it hadn't been a bad thing.
Hope it helps to clarify.
L.L Jacobson -
millsyooksy — 10 years ago(March 21, 2016 07:08 PM)
No words, this literally made me vomit.
"In regards to the first point, the film depicted the fisting act and Neil was doing it voluntarily and having fun. The man didn't force the kids to do anything and was very kind to them, so there would be no reason for them to feel threatened if they'd refused to perform the acts. Also, in RL scenarios oral sex is the most preferred act, and kids are used to sucking since birth. And if it's done to them, no harm done either, as even a 5 year old can enjoy some oral action down there."
Children do not "enjoy" being sexually abused by adults. I think you completely missed the point of this film. -
TheBoyWhoNeverLived — 12 years ago(September 20, 2013 02:59 PM)
I did finally watch it. Had my moment of 'discovery' 6 months ago. Throughout the film I cringed and felt disgusted but i got through the movie without breaking down. Now I feel empty andhope you will have it better in life. I feel like my soul has been corrupted and I am doomed forever.
Take care. -
horrorfanaticgirl — 11 years ago(July 11, 2014 07:38 PM)
I was molested, not anything like in the movie but I had to live with my molester for 4 more years before he finally died of cancer.
The ending got to me more than any other scenes in the movie. It left me shaking, feeling sick, stomach in knots and just want to break down with hard crying. I can't remember any movies that effected me more than this one. I hope anyone that has been through sexual abuse will be careful about watching this, especially if it's something you've not yet dealt with, I think you should be aware that this will bring up feelings you've not felt in years. -
Adiane — 11 years ago(August 04, 2014 05:20 AM)
It seems I'm one of the few people to have read the book before watching the movie, but yes, I'm a survivor and the story still has an incredible effect on me. I don't care much for the movie, but the book is one of my all-time favorites and it never fails to make me feel sick with empathy and strangely comforted at the same time. I can relate to keeping such a damaging secret to myself for a very long time, and also with repressing the memories to the extent where I didn't even believe it happened and thought I was crazy.
It's the very end of the movie and the credits - with that absolutely beautiful and haunting Sigur Ros song - that make me sob though. The sense that though the narrative is ending, the pain and recovery of these two characters will continue throughout the rest of their lives it's quite an emotional punch. -
csajourney — 11 years ago(January 24, 2015 06:04 PM)
I am a middle aged male who was abused from ages ten to fifteen and just heard of this movie today when looking at movie reviews for the LGBT communities. I can appreciate movies that offer characters who stories I can relate to. In the LGBT genre there are far too many comedies making homosexuals out to be those who are laughed at and bullied because the true emotions of the characters are never seen. I've cried many tears in my life over my helplessness as a survivor of abuse, bullied because of my differences, and ridiculed by classmates, strangers and even my own parents and family. I wish there were more dramatic movies like "Mysterious Skin" out there and more awareness to them. Statistics indicate that one in six boys will experience some form of sexual abuse by age 18 and the ratio is one in three to four for females. That, in my opinion, makes it an epidemic! Back in my day there were no resources for help like there is today as a result of the internet with various Facebook and website support groups. The ability to talk to others who have experienced similar experiences can offer a form of healing journey that silence cannot. For most of my life, I felt that I was the ONLY "survivor" of sexual abuse in the universe because it was never spoken about. It could not be discussed then like it can today. If you are in an abusive situation or was, now is the time to speak up and get help with those emotions. You can see how the characters in this movie chose two different paths one who could not remember and one who could not forget. There are people out there you can trust with your secret and that will understand you. I would like to see more movies like this one to help survivors realize that they are not alone and to maybe educate others that a one in six or one in four ratio for abuse victims is unacceptable. I wish Brian and Neil a lifetime of good wishes. Even though they are movie characters, they are still "real" people with "real" stories. I can attest to that.