even if your mother is unberable? just curious.
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verizonowner88 — 10 years ago(June 08, 2015 05:56 PM)
When Vi was telling the story about the Christmas boots I started to rock myself in my seat and I wasn't aware I was doing it until my own daughter asked if I was alright. The reason, I have a very similar story. My mother could be the woman this movie was written about-minus the drugs. My father was an alcoholic though. My mothers issue, rather than drugs, were mental health problems. She physically and mentally dominated and abused me for most of my life. I finally let her have it (verbally) last year and haven't spoken to her since. So, YES, finally I treated my mother equally as bad as she was treating me for most of my life.
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tryingcake — 10 years ago(September 08, 2015 04:17 PM)
For years I resented my parents for the way I was raised. I did not know I had choices. Finally one day, at age 45, I just walked away. Years later I am still estranged and still have peace in my life. Just walk away, people. It's not worth the stress it brings not to.
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Chara_Angel — 10 years ago(December 26, 2015 10:53 AM)
It was the only way to deal with her, and even then, the mother always found a way to get the upper hand. She was devouring everything in her path, so eventually the only decision was to leave or end up just like her.
The mother probably became that way after dealing with her OWN mother, in fact. She had to be mean so the other meanness wouldn't hurt as much. Didn't seem to work so well though, because she still needed her pills.
Little girls shouldn't look for four leaf clovers! -
Slammer2525 — 9 years ago(August 13, 2016 08:32 AM)
My mother behaves quite a bit like Violet. Although she has no outside addiction, such as drugs, she did have an addiction to herself. Im convinced my mother, although not professionally diagnosed, has Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). I finally did some research (I love the internet!) and came to the NPD conclusion. She has always turned everything around to be about her.
Part of being a narcissist is manipulating those around you to react in a particular way, which is one of the things Violet did. My mother has done this to me almost my entire life. She would say certain things to me to push my buttons knowing that I would react defensively and then she would sit back and smile to herself. After doing research and diagnosing her on my own, I was able to recognize when she was doing this and other manipulative tactics. When I stopped reacting the way she wanted me to,
she
started going off the deep. She knows I have her figured out and she doesnt like it. Narcissists never want anyone to figure out what they are.
This is the long way of saying that I understand Barbara completely. -
robbystoner — 9 years ago(August 26, 2016 04:52 PM)
sometimes i feel like it. i have found that as my mother has gotten older she has become unbearable. she wasn't always like that. she was very cool and down to earth. but as she has gotten older she has taken on a very bitter view and perspective on life and people in general. she has actually turned into my grandfather (her father!) and what i remember of him (even though I loved hi dearly) is that he was quite a bitter and a downer of a person. I remember him getting drunk and talking weird stuff to my and my cousin when were were like 14 or 15. He was saying stuff like if he ever came across our great grandfather on the street he would tear his throat out of his neck with his teeth.
Its all long past and long ago and may he rest in peace. But he was a very bitter. Even though he was nice to his grand kids. What doesn't add up is that, I know my grand father had a hard life because of all the thing that happened to him in WWI and WWII and maybe his bitterness could be understood. But my mother was a 60s child. It does not seem that she had the same hard life as him. It almost seems that she inherited the genes but not the bagage. Who knows. I am just hoping I don't turn into her.
Can this really be the end..to be stuck inside of mobile
with the Memphis blues again. -
chungmusic — 9 years ago(October 30, 2016 04:58 AM)
My father's a drunk, who constantly mocks me and my mom. We've gone at it many times (physically) over the years when he goes beyond the limit. So the Barbara-Violet showdown hits very close to home. Worst of all, my dad just knows where to prick (just like Violet) so it hurts the most and makes me lose the control. I believe anyone who has lived with an alcoholic or an addict knows how hard it is, and can relate to this movie, especially if they addict in question is as mouthy as Violet.
One day in the year of the fox came a time remembered well -
AssetsonFire — 9 years ago(December 18, 2016 05:47 PM)
Where do you think Barbara learnt it?
~.~
There were three of us in this marriage
http://www.imdb.com/list/ze4EduNaQ-s/ -
ronnoco28 — 5 years ago(January 04, 2021 11:21 PM)
Barbara's physical attack on her mother was reprehensible. She should have controlled herself, and if she just couldn't control herself, she ought to have left the dining-room. But to be honest, Violet was egging her on, and just about daring her to do it. As Violet herself said later, "I was spoiling for a fight, and you gave it to me."
Violet and her mother had a love-hate relationship, they were both confrontational, and it was how they related to each other. That's the way that some people are.