Why did it so bad at the Box Office?!
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krasnegar — 19 years ago(June 03, 2006 07:06 PM)
Yes, it could have been a parody if it didn't take itself so seriously. And you've got to communicate to me that it's a parody. Like
Last Action Hero
did that well. Maybe a bit over-the-top, but at least I knew it wasn't serious.
Last Action Hero
a
little
over the top?
Okay, i understand why you don't like this film there's not much oxygen in the air on your planet.
And would you mind explaining in just what way this film "take
itself so seriously"?
And if you require a "This is Parody" notice upfront, you'd better stick to getting your praody from
Mad
magazine. (But stay away from issues from before about 1980, 'cos they actually expected you to be able to recognise parody and satire [and tell the difference, by gum] all by yourself.) -
KeithFerguson — 19 years ago(June 05, 2006 09:17 AM)
So you do consider this a parody?
Last Action Hero made it a clear point to take action cliches, point them out, and make fun of them. They started this early on and kept it up for the duration of the film. The problem with The Long Kiss Goodnight is that there are so many movies that are just like it, and certainly not all of them are parodies, that it's impossible for me to ascertain whether it's a parody or if it's something to be parodied. The Long Kiss Goodnight doesn't do anything, from what I remember, to indicate that it's a parodyother than be completely ridiculous. But just ten minutes with a Sci-Fi Channel original movie is enough to tell you that not all ridiculous movies are parodies. Being a bad action movie is not enough to constitue being a parody. You've got to let the audience in on the joke at some point. I think.
Now, as far as how this movie takes itself seriously. All the characters accepted every ridiculous situation and every ridiculous character with complete sincerity. There was never a point where the bad guys were like, 'She's on ICE SKATES???' In a film that doesn't take itself seriously, there are points where it pokes fun at itself, either at some of the over-the-top characters or the over-the-top situations. So if they had that, like Samuel L. Jackson commenting on how they out-ran a grenade explosion, the movie would have been a bit more bearable.
But even if it is a parody, it's not really funny enough. In fact, it's less funny if the creators were really trying to parody action movies, because at least now I can sort of laugh at their ineptitude. But mostly I just sat around waiting for it to end.
This movie just reminded me of the ideas for movies my friend would have in the seventh grade. There are many movies like that, and I really don't care for any of them. I would recommend this movie to a seventh grader, because this seems to be what they enjoy. I'll waste my time with a higher grade of entertainment, myself. Like True Lies! Bad Boys II! Really, anything with Arnold or Will.
Parody, at least what I recall from copyright law, is using a work and altering it to the point of absurtity. Satire's function traditionally is one that punishes vice through sarcasm and irony and rewards virtue, usually embodied in a satirical norm, character that represents the way the author thinks people should act. At least what I recall from British Literature in college.
45! 22! Fight for freedom 'til we're free!
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moon_xean — 19 years ago(October 20, 2006 02:08 PM)
Bad Boys II?
Halfway through I turned it off because of the horrific swearing and endless car chases and shoot outs. TLKG wasn't a masterpiece, but I found it good enough to watch the ending. Too much clich, I agree, but Bad Boys II is on my list of 10 worst movies. -
KeithFerguson — 19 years ago(October 20, 2006 07:08 PM)
Well, as I've said, tastes are different. For me, when I watch an action movie, I want to see action, and a lot of it. Bad Boys II delivered, and I like Will Smith and Martin Lawrence. I'm not sure what else to expect from action movies
But, even though I don't care for Long Kiss Goodnight, I believe the ten reasons it did poorly in box office still stand even if I did. The reasons aren't so much of a critique as aspects of the movie that the movie-going audience generally does not care for, especially because at this point in history, they were being overwhelmed by movies of this nature. (Plus it's a rated R movie, which never make moneyit's got to be Godfather if you want to see it pull down $80 million dollars in box office.)
I watched Lethal Weapon recently, the movie that started it all. I didn't really care for that one either. I don't like action movies that aspire to be dramas. Just give me action and leave the drama to people who can actually write it. I mean no offense, that's just how I like my movies.
45! 22! Fight for freedom 'til we're free!
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Zanchief — 19 years ago(October 23, 2006 07:30 AM)
Your 10 reasons might stand for why it did poorly at the box office if it wasn't for the fact that no one contemplating going to see this movie would ever know any of those miniscule plot details.
This was a victim of an under marketed movie because Geena Davis wasn't a big enough draw at the box-office.
It's a clever script. Sammy Jackson, Geena Davis and Craig Bierko are all good, plus it has some good smaller roles from David Morse and Brian Cox.
I'll give you a free piece of advice Fergy, the reason you haven't hacked it as a Hollywood screenwriter is the same reason you can't tell this script apart from Bad Boys II. -
KeithFerguson — 19 years ago(October 23, 2006 10:08 AM)
Kids can be so cruel
There's a phenomenon called 'word of mouth' and a marketing device called 'trailers' that have a lot to do with how people decide to watch movies. When a movie is good 'word of mouth' draws people into the theater faster than marketing can. 'Trailers' also give people a good indication if the movie is one they want to watch. If I had just seen a trailer to this movie, I still could have told you about all ten reasons.
Anyway, regardless of how it performed in box office, the number we should be concentrating on are the video and overseas revenues. That's really what the industry cares about. Domestic box office revenue is fairly insignificant.
45! 22! Fight for freedom 'til we're free!
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Zanchief — 19 years ago(October 23, 2006 10:23 AM)
You admit yourself you never saw a trailer and don't remember this movie ever being out. The discussion ends there. That's why it didn't perform at the box office. Video sales are irrelevant since that isn't what the poster was talking about.
Word of mouth at the time was actually pretty good. The critics generally liked the movie. The studio just didn't want to spend any money marketing it after Cutthroat Island bombed.
You asked for clever lines of dialogue from the movie, well you don't have to go any further than the memorable quotes section of IMDB.
Mitch: The last time I got blown, candy bars cost a nickel.
Mitch: So, you cold?
Charlie: Yeah. Freezing.
Mitch: Turn on the heat. It doesn't work, but it makes a very annoying noise - distracts from the cold.
Mitch Henessey: What I'm saying is, back when we first met, you were all like "Oh phooey, I burned the darn muffins." Now, you go into a bar, ten minutes later, sailors come runnin' out. What up with that?
Alley Agent: Good evening, pretty lady. How 'bout some company?
Charlie: No thanks. I'm saving myself 'til I get raped.
Nathan: Alice, please. Your dog, Alice. It and my appetite are mutually exclusive.
Alice: Well, what's wrong with the dog?
Nathan: Simple. He's been licking his beep for the last three straight hours. I submit to you that there is nothing there worth more than an hour's attention. I should think that whatever he is attempting to dislodge is either gone for good, or there to stay. Wouldn't you agree?
Charlie: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Mitch Henessey: I hope not, 'cause I'm thinking how much my balls hurt.
Mitch: Oh, beep Ah, that hurt like beep
Samantha: I know. That's why I distracted you first. Same principle as deflowering virgins.
Mitch: Huh? What? Virgin - ? What?
Samantha: Read it in this Harold Robbins book. Guy bites her on the ear. Distracts from the pain. Ever try that?
Mitch: No, no, I sock 'em in the jaw and yell, "Pop goes the weasel."
And they don't even have the great ham on rye line.
A masterpiece this aint, but if you can't separate this from your everyday Renny Harlin action movie, you have no business being anywhere near Hollywoodscratch that, you'll fit right in. -
ladiorange — 19 years ago(February 07, 2007 02:52 AM)
Alley Agent: Good evening, pretty lady. How 'bout some company?
Charlie: No thanks. I'm saving myself 'til I get raped.
I laughed so hard when I heard that!
What would Mr Belvedere tell Wesley at a time like this?
http://myspace.com/ladiorange -
spongemonkey-1 — 19 years ago(February 13, 2007 02:51 AM)
I'm trying to hack it as a professional screenwriter in Hollywood. Does that count?
Good luck with that.
from what i can tell, you are one of the few people in this thread with decent taste in movies, and you can see beyond what you merely like, and what is actually good.
I realize this is some crazy-ass multi-year thread, but I just got done watching TLKG for the first time and came to IMBD afterwards (also a habit of mine).
I'd have to agree that this flick was full of cliches and cheesy dialog and was only worth watching once.
I know some people will not dig that statement but thats ok.
I like plenty of crap movies, but I am also well aware they are crap, but for some reason I like them and they have merit to me. But that doesn't make them some brilliant masterpiece either.
Oh, and can anyone explain to me WHY on earth they drove the semi with the car and frozen terrorist and Sam Jackson in it, up to the soon-to-be-exploding tanker AND AND AND backed it up???
They did say they were gonna drop the car and the body in a ravine 5 miles from the city. I don't think Niagra Falls qualifies as a ravine. -
KeithFerguson — 19 years ago(February 13, 2007 10:14 AM)
My roommates have introduced me into camp movies and a true appreciation of them (and by that I mean ironic appreciation). When I watched this particular movie, I wasn't coming from that school of movie-going. I wonder if I watch it again if I'll like it any better. I should try it out and post the results.
I did recently see Running Scared and I probably would have hated that movie just as much as Kiss Goodnight if not more if I had seen it before I had my protective shield of ironic detachment. As it is, my only complaint with Running Scared is it is way too long, but it's got some great moments if you like laughing at pure idiocracy captured on film. ("I'm kinda parched.")
45! 22! Fight for freedom 'til we're free!
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jwjordan100 — 18 years ago(February 22, 2008 07:48 AM)
Sorry, but anyone who includes "Dumb and Dumber" in a list of acceptable, let alone good movies instantly loses credibility points. As you point out, your objectivity is suspect, as is anyone's when it comes to assessing entertainment. Everyone has different tastes and points of reference. That it seems to matter to you so much that you be "right" is all we really need to know. Other people obviously enjoyed the movie more than you did. Why does that bother you so much. I personally shared some of your criticisms, but still found it fairly entertaining. So, I guess that means I mystify you. I'll just have to see if I can live with myself knowing that I've disappointed KeithFerguson.
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blackpussycafe — 17 years ago(October 19, 2008 06:30 PM)
your opinion loses alot of credibility saying dumb and dumber and se7en are great movies.
Charlie: Were you always this stupid, or did you take lessons?
Mitch Henessey: I took lessons.
you might try reading books. fun movie. -
ritamilo — 17 years ago(October 26, 2008 03:36 PM)
Geena was married to Renny Harlin when she made this movie, and also "Cutthroat Island" which was a pirate thriller. Her films with Harlin did not do that well at box office. I think that it was difficult for people to perceive Geena as an action heroine. Long Kiss Goodnight had some good moments, but I think it was a tad too long and at the end, I was waiting them to wind it up a little sooner than they did.
I think people had associated Geena with Tootsie, Accidental Tourist, Earth Girls are Easy and other flicks and weren't ready to buy her playing the "spy who came in from the cold."
"truth against the world" - attributed to Boudicca of the Iceni -
chahn-1 — 18 years ago(August 24, 2007 10:23 AM)
While I want to disagree with your comment as a whole, I cannot, as
you are factually correct, to a degree.
I want to disagree because I liked this film very much.
I sometimes break films into two categories: Important vs Enjoyable
.but then I have to admit that this film is not Important,
but it was Enjoyable.
Many of my favorite films fall into this category.
("True Lies" is a good example)
I recommend that everyone get through as many of the Criterion type
of films as they can. These are films that really inform.
But I will never regret the simple enjoyments that un-important films
have brought to me. -
neuroside — 20 years ago(June 04, 2005 01:26 PM)
Hey, about half those reasons you mentioned are what make this move so awesome. number five on your list for example, everything you listed in that one paragraph was what made that movie so freaking amazing, sure its not true to life but movies are metaphors man. if you want reality go watch a documentary, and I'm not talking about any of Michael Moores films either, cause everyone knows he's full of beep
It's only after we've lost everything, that we're free to do anything. -
KeithFerguson — 20 years ago(June 06, 2005 02:41 PM)
I guess that's where we part ways. I must not find as much enjoyment from retardation as my friend here. I spent at least a minute trying to figure out exactly what you meant by 'movies are metaphors' and how that had anything to do with 'Long Kiss Goodnight,' but then I finally just gave up. And while I'm not sure I can all that much, would you mind explaining what you mean by that?
Also, I'd like to take time out to apologize to anyone who sees me as an a-hole. This is like a little release for me and I'm not really like this in real life. I'm much more easy-going and I'm not quite as condescending.
45! 22! Fight for freedom 'til we're free!