Things You Learned from watching Excalibur
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jh66 — 14 years ago(December 14, 2011 01:30 PM)
- Despite tussling with a dozen knights of the Round Table, Llancelot will still be 100% clean in bright silver armourundented!
- When king, your sexy half-sister will patrol the place doing black magic and acting atrociously- and nobody will notice!
- When king, your father's men will vanish without explanation.
- If you are cast out (Llancelot) you will grow a beard, act strange and smell like a tramp.
- When you're horny, mount a horse and jump off a cliff! Your lust will 'hold you up'- too bad if you're impotent!
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Anxiety1138 — 14 years ago(February 02, 2012 06:10 PM)
- Walking, riding and fighting in full plate armor is only noisy when you are not sneaking up on your wife and best friend lying the woods post coitus to plunge your sword into the ground between their naked bodies.
Don't you want to become one with me? To be of one mind and body?
- Walking, riding and fighting in full plate armor is only noisy when you are not sneaking up on your wife and best friend lying the woods post coitus to plunge your sword into the ground between their naked bodies.
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BuckRogersTwentyFifth — 13 years ago(June 29, 2012 02:29 PM)
- John Boorman is a pervert (hard to describe a man who directs his nude daughter in a graphic sex scene any other way)
I don't have an opinion. The word "opinion" implies the possibility I'm wrong.
- John Boorman is a pervert (hard to describe a man who directs his nude daughter in a graphic sex scene any other way)
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diddymuck — 13 years ago(January 15, 2013 01:13 AM)
Knights eat, sleep, drink, have sex, negotiate, dance and fight all while wearing their armor!
By doing so, they apparently never need to bathe.
Lancelot can, contrary to above, take off his armor while sleeping, but it will get mad and try to cleave him to death.
Lancelot is so independent he can remove his armor and apparently put it all on all by himselfeven the parts that attach in the back.
Merlin has trouble carrying a tuneeven while talking.
If Helen Mirren were my half-sister, I would brook no hesitation in schtumping her silly eitherno disguise necessary! -
pawtrax67 — 12 years ago(May 20, 2013 11:19 AM)
Mirren, Neeson, and Stewart must practise magic because 30 years later they all look incredible.
Wizards trapped by a Sorceress are a dream to someand a NIGHTMARE TO OTHERS!!!!
Arthur and his knights had advanced technology that they had full plate armour 900 years before anyone else.