Choosing to do heroin…
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vicksta10 — 11 years ago(February 24, 2015 02:51 AM)
I'm not sure where you got the information that "chasing that first high" is a myth, but I can tell you, absolutely, that it is not a myth. The "chasing" is a result of the user's eventual tolerance to a drug, in which larger amounts of said drug are needed to attain that original high (which they never do). I'm not talking about the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, or even the 4th use-the chasing comes after however long it takes for an individual to reach his/her own level of tolerance/addiction. I'm guessing by your User Name that you may understand what I'm saying. Hope this helps debunk that "myth".
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Suboxone — 11 years ago(March 14, 2015 01:41 AM)
I got that information from being addicted to heroin. There is no chasing the first high. My 5th high was better then my first. What you are describing is tolerance. People have to use more to get that same high they had before but there is no chasing the very first high. The first time you get high is exactly the same as the 50th. I'm not talking about tolerance. You do get to a point where you have to inject two packs instead of one. I'm just talking about this whole weird "very first high is always the best and you'll never get that again" because that just isnt true. You could do some dirty weak black tar dope the first time and then get some really good pure stuff and it'll be better then that first time you did it.
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vicksta10 — 11 years ago(March 15, 2015 01:55 PM)
Well, I guess heroin is different than my previous drug of choice. As an addict for 10 years, I was constantly chasing that first high. 7ecIt was not ever the same as the beginning so I still believe it not to be a myth. But I respect your opinion and cannot comment on heroin use as it is the one drug I never allowed myself to use-thank God. I hope life is better for you now.
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Danimal_77 — 11 years ago(September 18, 2014 01:19 AM)
Curious about what? Signing your life away? How could something that self-destructive lend to any form of curiosity? Do you stand on your balcony and think what it would be like to jump off it and plummet to your death? There really is no difference whatsoever. Well there is one. Heroin (as you probably are fully aware) robs your soul and kills you slowly and brutally. Hate to say it, but your comment does say a lot about your personality.
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Torrible_2013 — 12 years ago(February 08, 2014 04:57 AM)
Is there a, "Sure, other people get addicted to it, but it won't happen to me!" mentality behind that first time?
Apparently yes.
http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/guest-blog/2012/10/18/dangerous-op timism-risk-bias-and-smoking/
The optimism bias (also known as unrealistic or comparative optimism) is a bias that causes a person to believe that they are less at risk of experiencing a negative event compared to others. There are four factors that cause a person to be optimistically biased: their desired end state, their cognitive mechanisms, the information they have about themselves versus others, and overall mood. The optimistic bias is seen in a number of situations. For example: people believing that they are less at risk of being a crime victim, smokers believing that they are less likely to contract lung cancer or disease than other smokers, first-time bungee jumpers believing that they are less at risk of an injury than other jumpers, or traders who think they are less exposed to losses in the markets. -
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Danimal_77 — 11 years ago(September 18, 2014 01:25 AM)
Man, your comments just keep outdoing the last in the stupidity department, don't they? Yes, I can debate you on more of an intellectual level, but something tells me you would have to "experience more life" to be able to accomplish that task with any form of success.
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eYeDEF — 12 years ago(February 09, 2014 08:47 AM)
Is there a, "Sure, other people get addicted to it, but it won't happen to me!" mentality behind that first time? If so, there's a real narcissism in that.
Sometimes. Or there's just a neglect to even think that far ahead.
Is there a, "I'll cross that bridge when I get to it." mentality (regarding the likelihood of addiction)? If so, that's a short-sighted, live-for-the-moment mentality that's careless and immature.
Again, thinking "I'll cross that bridge when I get to it" is already thinking further ahead than they actually are. It might be careless and immature, but sometimes it's fun to be careless and immature.
Is there a, "Who cares what may happen? I hate life anyway2000." mentality? If so, that's obviously rooted in depression.
Sure, that's possible too. Is depression what drove PSH to it? Who knows?
Sometimes it just has to do with overwhelming curiosity and a desire to get blitzed out of one's mind for the fun of it. I guess you never having done drugs that's really not something you're capable of understanding.
I really want to understand how someone can willingly elect to go down such a destructive path. There seems to be no logic in doing heroin for the first time.
Who said logic had anything to do with it? Everyone does things that aren't necessarily logical, including you I'm sure. -
Ironman54 — 12 years ago(February 10, 2014 09:06 PM)
In the not too distant past, the statistics for fatal car crashes in the US was 50,000 people are killed annually (not sure of current statistics). Often when driving a car, one aims 2,500 lbs of steel in one direction at speeds often 50+ mph toward oncoming vehicles - from sub compacts to 18 wheelers, all passing in the opposite direction separated only by a painted line on the road and only by a few feet Kinda risky wouldn't you say ? Yet millions play the odds and do this every day.
Ok, no one has to try heroin to get to work obviously but people can/will do the above but question the judgement/sanity of someone who tries a drug for the first time. I agree its not a smart move, no doubt a bout it but I bet you drive a car (or ride in some type of motor vehicle) yet question why another would do something like try a drug.
If everyone around you is doing xyz and apparently none the worse for it (sometimes the horrendous effects of drug abuse don't become apparent until weeks/months later), the uninitiated can be deluded into thinking 'I know what 'they' say but how bad can it really be ?'
No one can be sure of how a drug, be it alcohol, heroin, cocaine etc., is going to effect them until they do it. Many people are sure they have the will power to try it once and walk away. Some people can - but you're truly playing Russian Roulette thinking before hand that you too will be the one that can. Once you try it, you will forever know that there is an 'escape', a better version of 'well being' and that 'knowledge' is what can draw the person back - even after 20+ years of abstinence.
Anyone who knows anything about narcotics will tell you that the first time taking one is a very pleasurable experience. No human being should ever experience it if it can be at all avoided. Its too pleasurable. The first time I received an injection of Demerol (hospital ER) I clearly remember thinking 'Why were we not made to feel like this all the time ?" I should say, not everyone has a pleasurable experience the first time. Some people do say they find the experience to be anything but pleasurable (because of the nausea etc. - many variables) but they are, by far, the exception to the rule. Others are introduced to narcotics by prescription and they take the med. as prescribed then walk away from it when the 10 days are up and the meds are gone. Many though find that for the first time, they feel 'normal' (not depressed etc) and they are the ones who by and large become addicts. Brain chemistry has everything to do with it. Some people are simply predisposed - they have a 'deficit' and the deficit is corrected by the introduction of a narcotic (or alcohol etc) to their system. If you don't have a deficit/predisposition, you will more than likely be one of those who take the med/drug for no more than 10 days , within a certain range/dosage and walk away from it without a problem (or have 2/3 drinks and go home). You may predict that you will be one of the lucky ones but I guarantee you, there is no way to no for sure until you try it - and therein lies the rub.
As to WHY try it the first time (what was asked by the OP) ?
Too many variables but for many its that they have never felt comfortable in their own skin so to speak or have never felt that they experience 'joy' or well being as others seem to and the temptation to see if this drug can make them feel 'right' is just too overwhelming of a temptation. If people had no idea what 'euphoria' meant, they would probably never put a white powder up their nose let alone inject it into their body. What would be the 'enticement' ? Unless you're really drunk or desperate to feel normal/good for the first time in your life (or many years) you wouldn't do something so odd. The stuff is the devil incarnate.
*Of course its needed by those people in great pain but other than that the devil. -
suza271 — 12 years ago(February 19, 2014 01:54 PM)
There are some born with the disease of addictionsome not. My Mom thinks vicodin makes her sick and hates it. I, however, would down the whole bottle in my using days (or snort them). Many times addiction takes hold of you in a way you wouldn't believe. Educated, rational people who are highly successful when not in an altered state (or searching for drugs once they've experienced them), will do anything and everything to get their drug of choice.
I LITERALLY grew up in a middle to upper class family with a white picket fence, parents who were stable, sent me to college and BAM! I got my wisdom teeth removed and all the sudden I couldn't get enough pills. I was a great student, daughter, grew up learning the morals of society (never stole in my lifenever would unless drugs were invloved). I was the one my parents bragged aboutgetting out of Ohio, hired for the job I always strived for by the age of 25, seemingly having my life together. Except little did anyone know I was racking up thousands in credit card debt, lying to my friends and family, scraping to get by. I had NO knowledge of addiction (except for DARE which barely teaches you ANYTHING about the chemical responses of drugs in your brain, that addiction is genetic, and how harmful they can bethis program just basically hadfrom my recollectionpeople dancing around to pop music and I got a shirt). Finally, I started stealing (and please don't let movies fool youaddicts can be the smartest, highly functioning, & cunning peoplenot all are "junkies living on the street"). Hell, I got my meds online.
I finally had to call my parents at the age of 28 and come home to live because I couldn't pay my rent and was facing my 2nd felony conviction. And, I'm the girl who didn't smoke weed til I was 27, didn't drink til 18, and followed all the rules.
There's a HUGE heroin problem in the midwest. After 3 yrs of sobriety I switched to shooting coke! And, let me tell you, I met 18 yr old girls selling their bodies for crack (which has a huge stigma, but for you judgementals out therecrack is just cocaine cob68oked up with baking soda and baby food). Most people (and I believe this was the case with PSH) continued to use because they got to the point to where the withdrawls from heroin or any opiate were just too much. In the days before his death he was seen with a runny nose, sweating, & shaking. Typical wd symptomseven on suboxone (which was found in his apt). I personally think he was trying to kick the H but those physical and mental wds make you WANT to die.
So, please, think twice before you walk in someone elses shoes. You have no clue what he was struggling with. Almost all addicts have some form of mental illness. Withdrawls definitely cause depression. And, who knows what else he was struggling with. I grieve deeply for his family who had to witness his addictive behaviors. But, at the same time, we have to celebrate his intense, amazing work. -
Soodinum — 12 years ago(February 19, 2014 03:41 PM)
"the dis1c84ease of addiction"
There's enough rethinking of the idea of addiction being a disease that it is no longer valid to just state it as a given and base your argument on that.
Take some time to investigate it and you will find many specialists now not only doubt that addiction is a disease, but think that progress in dealing with addiction effectively is harmed by that label.
'Then' and 'than' are completely different words and have completely different meanings. -
sjmedrano — 11 years ago(April 19, 2014 04:08 PM)
That makes sense. I had friends that would do hard core drugs and I saw how it affected them and didn't want any part of tht. Pain pills never wanted of tht either plus I'm allergic to chalky pills. The only thing I will take is Ibuprofen. I'm glad I do have a fear of drugs and don't want to go down that role but I do understand why some people turn to drugs to deal with life and then it becomes a way frm not being sick due from the withdrawals. I've heard people doing heroin is like chasing the dragon looking for that first experience with the drug and you will never experience. Its horrible and it doesnt help when Doctors hand out these pills like candy. I just wish PHS could of beaten this.
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SweetLadyH — 11 years ago(July 22, 2014 05:46 PM)
Suza, thank you for sharing your story. Many people don't know what it's like to love with addiction and when you come from a "perfect" life it seems it's even more difficult for people to understand. I admire your strength to get clean and your courage to unashamedly tell your story.
Not sure if you'd be interested, but I would love to talk with you indepth as well as share my story with you. If that's something you'd be interested in, send me a PM on here. If not, I totally understand.
Thank you again for sharing. I hope you're life now is filled with happiness and fulfillment.
namaste -
Sonfollower — 12 years ago(February 19, 2014 05:08 PM)
Ironman54,
Man, you put down on paper everything I wanted to say and more, but sometimes it is hard to express myself! You must be a writer with your ability, to spell it out so clearly, you are amazing!
Thank you for posting, it made me cry, really! I have been on anti-depressants for so many years, I can't count,I know exactly what you are saying is so damned true! I heard someone say that Heroin addicts are always chasing that first feeling from the drug. Yes, and I know the feeling from Demerol in the ER. I always said, now I know why it is easy to become an addict, what a feeling!
I just want to thank you for posting and I love the way you ended itthe devil! You definitely explained and answered many questions for myself and others! Bless You! -
Sonfollower — 12 years ago(February 19, 2014 02:47 PM)
It's the same thing with Alcohol, take one drink..then another.Anything can be addictive, sugar? We all have our addictions in one way or another, I know what you are saying. Did you know that Cigarettes are harder to kick than Heroin! And look how many people die from Cigarettes, from one thing to the other. We are at a war against good and evil, everyday! We have to fight against the things of the flesh all the time. That is why we need to be educated about these things, and know what we are dealing with. Do we want to take a chance and stick a needle in our arm (and not even know for sure what is in the drug)or smoke, drink for years.and thenLet's face it, the flesh is weak, very weak!!!
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SweetLadyH — 11 years ago(July 22, 2014 05:54 PM)
I'm sure you've gotten more than enough answers regarding your question, so I'll attempt to be brief.
As a former drug addict I can vouch for many things people have said here: sometimes it's to escape life (and although his life seems like there would be nothing to want to escape from, you never know the demons inside someone's head Sometimes the happiest people are the saddest inside), sometimes it's an opportunity handed to you at a party (peer pressure at any age is hard, especially when you're already under the influence of other substances), sometimes you're just looking for the next fix because your current drug isn't doing it for you anymore.
At any rate, I can tell you that no matter how bad something is for you, people still do it - alcohol, tobacco, unprotected sex, fast food. It doesn't matter, living in an age of instant gratification and the idea that the future isn't your concern at the moment leads many of us to make choices that we shouldn't.
Finally in specific regards to heroin: (and I'm not sure if I can say this on here so I hope I don't get flagged) imagine the best orgasm you have ever had in your entire life, now imagine that times 10. That's just the tip of the iceberg of how heroin makes you feel. That's pretty tempting no matter how bad for you it is.
Sorry for my long, rambling post. I hope you never have to experience the horrors of drug use - contrary to what many have said, it does not equate to "life experience" and certainly doesn't make you a better person because you've done things. Be who you are, be proud of it, and always find ways to improve upon yourself to make your life more fulfilling.
Namaste.